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Peter Skellern

Enlightened
Jan 10, 2025
1,071
Do you worry about being brave enough? It's one thing being on here or indeed investigating means. Many people obviously take steps to enable the means. But the actual doing it? This is certainly not a new concern I'd have thought.
 
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Loaf of bread

Warlock
Mar 22, 2022
743
Self-preservation survival instincts?

There are concerns about that, certainly a factor to consider.

It does vary a lot depending on which bus ticket one is using.
 
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Peter Skellern

Enlightened
Jan 10, 2025
1,071
Self-preservation survival instincts?

There are concerns about that, certainly a factor to consider.

It does vary a lot depending on which bus ticket one is using.
I have looked at a few. I fancied Carbon Monoxide but its extremely difficult to get in 99% form. In the UK its a Restricted product 🙁 and there are safety checks in place. Found the Heroin Mega thread so looking at Darkweb re options - maybe buying Morphine on there.

Notwithstanding that, I'm looking for simplicity and lots of methods seem contrived making the propensity to lose ones nerve great.
 
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Forever Sleep

Earned it we have...
May 4, 2022
12,386
Definitely I'm worried. Drinking SN seems at least less frightening than some other methods but, I don't think I'll really be able to convince myself that I'm not just about to take the most enormous risk.

Plus, SI of course. Not sure how strong mine is exactly. It's very strong if I perceive immediate threat though. I've taken risks in life where I knew I'd be able to rectify problems but, it being so out of my control troubles me. Plus, the worse case scenario is almost enough to put me off all together- failing but seriously injuring myself.

I feel like I should have an easy backup method prepared but, I don't feel comfortable/ confident with other things. So, it's all a worry really.
 
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Peter Skellern

Enlightened
Jan 10, 2025
1,071
Definitely I'm worried. Drinking SN seems at least less frightening than some other methods but, I don't think I'll really be able to convince myself that I'm not just about to take the most enormous risk.

Plus, SI of course. Not sure how strong mine is exactly. It's very strong if I perceive immediate threat though. I've taken risks in life where I knew I'd be able to rectify problems but, it being so out of my control troubles me. Plus, the worse case scenario is almost enough to put me off all together- failing but seriously injuring myself.

I feel like I should have an easy backup method prepared but, I don't feel comfortable/ confident with other things. So, it's all a worry really.

I agree on all your points.

1. SN I think is hardly peaceful. It's probably quite painful. I want peaceful or super quick. Yes, I know I'm being picky but why cant I be?

2. The serious injury or brain damage thing is a huge concern.

3. Yes its a WORRY.

I'm presently exploring buying things on the DM as a huge Opioid OD (ideally Morphine) is pretty foolproof (and peaceful). I also fancied gas but they're Restricted in the UK - wanted to let off CO in my bedroom.
 
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ijustwishtodie

ijustwishtodie

I have finally found my ultimate bliss
Oct 29, 2023
5,796
Yes, I worry about being brave enough. I think that suicide is the most brave thing that one can do due to the risks and uncertainty that is present within suicide. I've been getting panic attacks ever since I got the SN but unfortunately to be alive is to die and every human will one day have to go through this type of pain so all I'm doing is making the pain happen earlier. I'd still rather avoid the pain and I'd do so by dying in my sleep if that was possible but, unfortunately, such a thing isn't possible in this world and, if it was, humans won't ever let us access it. It isn't going to be easy but the only path that I have left is forward. I can't keep on perpetuating my existence as that's just going to cause me more pain plus I still have to deal with the dying process anyway so I may as well just make the inevitable happen quicker
 
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Peter Skellern

Enlightened
Jan 10, 2025
1,071
Yes, I worry about being brave enough. I think that suicide is the most brave thing that one can do due to the risks and uncertainty that is present within suicide. I've been getting panic attacks ever since I got the SN but unfortunately to be alive is to die and every human will one day have to go through this type of pain so all I'm doing is making the pain happen earlier. I'd still rather avoid the pain and I'd do so by dying in my sleep if that was possible but, unfortunately, such a thing isn't possible in this world and, if it was, humans won't ever let us access it. It isn't going to be easy but the only path that I have left is forward. I can't keep on perpetuating my existence as that's just going to cause me more pain plus I still have to deal with the dying process anyway so I may as well just make the inevitable happen quicker
I'm not sure. There's certainly options. Like Fentanyl patches or Morhpine tablets and drifting off in bed. Hence my seeing what I can find. I'm hoping someone on here will point me to a suitable DN UK market place.
 

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