kimikatachibana
katarina
- Feb 3, 2023
- 20
he's the only one i have left besides supstances.
we've been fighting a lot recently over things which ended up him saying him wishing he never met me and how i'm manipulating him into this relationship so i don't kill myself
it is true though, i hate myself so much for it but i simply cannot continue living without him and i keep hurting him due to me being sick in the head (bpd haha)
i cant blame him, i can't imagine the pressure i put on him and i promised him i would be better but it all seems hopeless
maybe it is easier to end it all, maybe that would result in him being happier when i'm gone but this is the first time i've ever felt happy with someone and i don't wanna just throw it away. i am really thinking about reaching out for help because if i want to keep this relationship i need to work on myself as a person.
we've been fighting a lot recently over things which ended up him saying him wishing he never met me and how i'm manipulating him into this relationship so i don't kill myself
it is true though, i hate myself so much for it but i simply cannot continue living without him and i keep hurting him due to me being sick in the head (bpd haha)
i cant blame him, i can't imagine the pressure i put on him and i promised him i would be better but it all seems hopeless
maybe it is easier to end it all, maybe that would result in him being happier when i'm gone but this is the first time i've ever felt happy with someone and i don't wanna just throw it away. i am really thinking about reaching out for help because if i want to keep this relationship i need to work on myself as a person.