Today is my birthday, 36 years old, I was planning to ctb today, because in my head, that would be one less day to remember me, since birthday and death anniversary would be on the same day. If I followed the plan, i probably would be incounscious or even dead by now, i planned to drink SN at 08h (GMT - 3, BrasĂlia time). But i simply can't make peace with all the damage my ctb would inflict on my loved ones, life has been unbearable recently, if this continues i will either go crazy or worse. I feel like life is a prision, a prision without walls because i could leave anytime, but I have to CHOOSE to stay to not hurt others, i CHOOSE to be tortured by life, so others dont are. And now every little nuisance happening today I can only think that I shouldn't be going through this, I should be at peace now. Sorry if I dont made myself clear, english its not my native language.
Last edited:
