• Hey Guest,

    We wanted to share a quick update with the community.

    Our public expense ledger is now live, allowing anyone to see how donations are used to support the ongoing operation of the site.

    👉 View the ledger here

    Over the past year, increased regulatory pressure in multiple regions like UK OFCOM and Australia's eSafety has led to higher operational costs, including infrastructure, security, and the need to work with more specialized service providers to keep the site online and stable.

    If you value the community and would like to help support its continued operation, donations are greatly appreciated. If you wish to donate via Bank Transfer or other options, please open a ticket.

    Donate via cryptocurrency:

    Bitcoin (BTC):
    Ethereum (ETH):
    Monero (XMR):
disgusting-life

disgusting-life

The smile's a bit crooked
Dec 25, 2025
92
Just why the fuck do I watch suicide videos...repeatedly and then have them saved on my fucking phone. Really?! All in the name of doing some 'research' for my method...it's actually messed up, why am I completely chill with watching random peoples transition from life to death over and over and over

Fuck me cuz what the actual hell
 
  • Like
  • Hugs
Reactions: itsgone2, ILiveForMusic and Rzzzyz
ILiveForMusic

ILiveForMusic

Member
Feb 10, 2026
10
I don't know how you do it. I can't stomach it, but I want to do it so bad. You get points for courage!!!
 
chaewon

chaewon

Member
Jan 8, 2026
57
I don't know how you do it. I can't stomach it, but I want to do it so bad. You get points for courage!!!
i remember the first time i was on one of those sites where u watch people dying out of curiosity and the suicide or hanging videos would literally always send chills down my spine, like i could watch literally anything no matter how disgusting but a fully clothed person kicking the chair off and hanging there always made me feel very different and uncomfortable.

Recently while looking at a hanging thread here there were some videos attached to show u how it would be if done correctly and so on, and I watched them felt numb asf didnt even feel slightly bad and in fact wished it was me instead , i didnt even realise id be numbed to this by now like the last time i saw something like that before it made me feel horrible but a few months later its totally fine
 
  • Hugs
  • Like
Reactions: ILiveForMusic and itsgone2
I

itsgone2

-
Sep 21, 2025
1,290
Recently while looking at a hanging thread here there were some videos attached to show u how it would be if done correctly and so on, and I watched them felt numb asf didnt even feel slightly bad and in fact wished it was me instead , i didnt even realise id be numbed to this by now like the last time i saw something like that before it made me feel horrible but a few months later its totally fine
It's terrible. I never would've been on a site like that before. Yesterday I spent a few hours watching shooting videos, trying to desensitize myself to it. It's partly working, but I hate watching them. It reminds me of the life I had where watching videos like this was unthinkable.

For OP though it sounds like you like watching them and it bothers you. I'm sorry. Nothing to say really, just I wish we had lived different lives and never knew about these things in the first place
 
Last edited:
  • Love
Reactions: disgusting-life

Similar threads

ShadowedChaos
Replies
0
Views
106
Suicide Discussion
ShadowedChaos
ShadowedChaos
nowizard
Replies
13
Views
685
Suicide Discussion
comeoutandhauntme
comeoutandhauntme
psychoelectricangel
Replies
0
Views
253
Suicide Discussion
psychoelectricangel
psychoelectricangel