Venting Becoming a hater

[Zegers]

I wasn't like this before but i think so many bad experiences (pretty much the whole hellish track) is making me hate people, i feel extremely anxious with any little argument even with someone random, i'm not able to get myself to dont give a fuck about things. I think this hostile world is -one of the reasons- why i want ctb

It resonates with you?

 

[Mr.Tristesse]

It's normal to feel this way. But we shouldn't take it on innocent people.

 

[hungry_ghost]

i'm not able to get myself to dont give a fuck about things.

It takes a long time to get to the point where you don't care what people think.

You usually have to go through a series of experiences/breakthroughs.

But yeah, being misanthropic is pretty normal, I think, at least for people who have been outcasts/treated badly by others for so long.

 

[Everlong]

I still find myself too sensitive from what others think or say at times. I try and remember we are all in pain, self conscious and swinging a stick blindly through this life.
There's an anecdote in How to Win Friends and Influence People. Dale Carnegie is on a train and this guy's children are running amok. The father seems oblivious to it. Dale finally has enough and scorns the father about putting the kids in their place. The father comes to and says, "You're right bin so sorry. We are going home from their mother's funeral and I guess I just don't know what to do."
Ya never know. But this is how I think at my best. I'm not always at my best.

 

[Smart No More]

Not sure if you're using the word/term hater in the way that's become common in pop culture these days. If so I would point out that that term is a massive over simplification often used as a blanket term to support selective beliefs of a self agrandising nature or to justify ignorance. Perhaps not always but its a very broad term by its very nature even though its intent is very narrow.

Hatred is a natural reaction to certain stimuli. It can be bittter and disproportionate but isn't always. However hatred is a very strong feeling and probably isn't genuinely felt as often as is claimed. Disgust and disdain are often the actual feelings people attribute as hate. It seems minor but when it's something causing you concern the specifics matter as there's a relevant difference between hatred and disdain.

Ultimately though, the most important factor is what the source of your feelings (whatever they may be) is. If your feelings are disproportionate to the input/stinuli and represent irrationality then that's understandably concerning for obvious reasons and reflects on a deeper issue in need of address however, when/if your feelings are in equality to the input and genuinely rational its not something you should beat yourself up over! It does obviously indicate an issue exists but the issue is an external one.

I too find myself leaning toward disgust and dislike for things I see and experience (more specifically people and their intent or poor quality of character) and I can totally understand how it make you feel bitter and concerned for the impression you give off to others. It's a sad situation but if you're honest with yourself andress and challenge yourself for your misgivings then you're doing a lot more than most. The leaders of our countries and governments included. Then there's advertising with it's attempts at manipulation, the depravity and ignorance of certain elements of pop culture and the general expectations in the world of finance and employment. The way we rape and destroy our plant and pat ourselves on the back if we do the bare minimum in recycling. As a species with such amazing potential we're really letting ourselves down. If you see that for what it is, even if it's only in the small things in day to day life (which I'd argue are just as important as the 'bigger' things) then it's understandable that your feelings will be a mirror of that stimuli. I think what we have to ask ourselves is what are we gonna do about it, and how?

Looking back at OP is seems you're refering more to personal interactions and arguments you had with people. Maybe arguments you witnessed, I don't know. I hate arguing too. Mainly because I generally find that most people are more interested in winning a fight rather than actually getting to the root of the issue argued. People make it about them and that makes the argument entirely pointless because a victory is hollow without a genuine resolution. Maybe it's unrealistic to expect better of people but if they enter into an argument they raised that bar, not you or I. I mean what's the point in entering into argument if its only to leave with a hollow victory that serves to support a fragile ego and provide a disservice to it's subject matter. Its a waste of time, energry and life force. This is one of those smaller things that I would argue are much bigger in scope than they appear on the surface as they represent an attitude of selfishness and poor character which is a blight they stain our world with as they continue through their life. It's this mentality that lays the roots for the problems our world is facing.