lostmilo
Member
- Aug 19, 2024
- 31
I haven't posted on here in ages as I did actually manage to get out of the deep depression i was in a few months ago and although it's not as bad now I still really wan to kill myself almost on a daily basis. I'm honestly so frustrated that I'm too lazy to do anything right now including just being able to hang myself properly. I tried partial on my wardrobe a few months ago which didn't work since there wasn't enough tension and I also tried full on the curtain rod and embarrassingly just ender up breaking it. My last chance for my room set up is the ceiling light which I don't know why I didn't think of that in the first place. I'm worried that it won't hold my weight (60kg) and I'll just come crashing down and that will just be mega embarrassing. I still plan to use the same ligature (a bathrobe belt) (stupid i know but it's better than nothing). I'm just so fed up know cause I realise that I'm always going to be like this no matter how many things in my life change I'm always going to be a suicidal, anxious reck whilst everyone else gets on with their life feeling all accomplished and ever step I make to even feel slightly better I get kicked back 100x harder. Why do I have to be so useless