N

noname223

Angelic
Aug 18, 2020
4,966
I am in my mid-twenties. I am texting with a woman from a dating app. I think she likes that I am no fuck boy. In her profile she emphasized no F+ and no ONS.
I am not really interested in that (with her(?)). The irony is: she keeps me at a huge distance. I feel not good with that. I would need a stronger bond between us. Also in case something sexual happened I would like to have a stronger emotional bond between us before something like that happened. But that might be my male brain thinking in advance. It was only our first date maybe this thought is unnecessary. At the same time it is normal wanting to be attracted to someone.

I noticed I really have a stronger need for an emotional bond than sexuality activities per se. I am not sure why. I usually avoid in-depth talks about my sexuality. I have some theories in mind which I won't share it on here but I have shared them with my friends. Maybe it's the medication I am on. Maybe I have a distorted notion of sexual activities.

I am not asexual. And I even considered to go the same route as some lonely men on here paying an escort shortly before my suicide because I would like to know how it feels. At the same time I think I would not be in the mood for that facing my death. I don't know.

There were some members who said that most men at my age are mostly obsessed by sex and the companionship factor is less relevant for them. I think I am a pretty romantic guy. I love David Foster Wallace's love stories. I think this romanticism also influences my stance to ONS and stuff like that.


There were women who I would only consider ONS or F+ material. But only if both completely agree on this relationship and noone wants more. Tbh I think I would want more pretty soon. I assume that. And in some cases this would not be good.

I think it is probably dependent on the individual. Maybe at 30 on average? I don't know. I am just a noname spreading his bullshit in a suicide forum.
 
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Dr Iron Arc

Dr Iron Arc

Into the Unknown
Feb 10, 2020
20,670
I don't think it's really much of an age thing. Plenty of middle age and older men fall back into those same fuckboy behaviors especially when they hit their midlife crisis. There are also plenty who continue this behavior well past their 30s because they never even got to during their teens or 20s. It just depends on the person I guess.
 
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eatantz

eatantz

I luv dolls
Nov 4, 2023
553
My dads reaching 60 and he still hooks up with multiple different woman weekly so....
 
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Cinnamorolls

Cinnamorolls

Student
Apr 28, 2024
148
In my observations, it's a personality thing and not an age thing. A man who sees women as nothing but objects to be used will not grow out of that mentality with time. Yeah, he'll get married and have kids eventually, but he'll end up cheating on the wife because he doesn't see women as equal human beings with feelings. Especially if her body ends up looking bad after having kids (loose skin, stretch marks, weight gain etc). You can find millions of posts on the internet where men of all ages confess to this.

In terms of when a man typically wants to settle down and get married, which is a different question, that's around 30 for sure. A man who is ready to settle down in his mid 20s is a rarity, which can frustrate women as they typically have an urge to get married earlier than men do.
 
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DefinitelyReady

DefinitelyReady

*perpetually annoyed*
Mar 14, 2024
1,126
That's a loaded question...
I'm surprised you're a dude lol. Not in a bad way or anything, just surprised😄
 
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biasedregret

Member
Feb 23, 2024
43
Plenty of men never act like this at any stage in their lives.
 
DefinitelyReady

DefinitelyReady

*perpetually annoyed*
Mar 14, 2024
1,126
Never.

(2nd response [above] to my forgetting that I had already responded to this. Hooked this fish twice🎣🐟😂)
That's a loaded question...
I'm surprised you're a dude lol. Not in a bad way or anything, just surprised😄
I was going to like this, because it took me from the bottom up, but it was aleady Thee (i) who wrote it🤣
 
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AmericanMary

AmericanMary

Mage
Apr 30, 2024
599
as someone who has dated men 2x my age my entire life, k would argue that it's the mentality of the man and not the age. I use to think I dated older men bc they were "mature." Half the 50 year olds I've dated are less mature and more fuck boy ish than guys my age.