are you promiscous

[Marz]

i never had a rebellious phase in my teenage years. but now i'm truly losing all my marbles or any sort of care about keeping my life to be seemingly normal so i'm starting to sleep around. next is probably doing drugs. i literally don't care because i'm planning to kill myself soon anyways. i feel like a stranger. but i want to feel it all before i die.

 

[Alchemist]

For that I'd have to be attractive, so no. I guess even during my biggest suicidal moods I tend to be pretty boring. But I agree you should enjoy your last days as much as you can.

 

[Empty Smile]

That was my plan for a while. Sleep around, get drunk as fuck, destroy things, etc....

But now I'm old as fuck and decided I wanted my final times to be peaceful. But I'll still get drunk like I do all the time now.

 

[Walilamdzi]

What do you class as promiscuous?

 

[Roberto]

I'm like a priest.

 

[CFLoser]

I am ugly as fuck.

 

[To match the colors]

I despise promiscuity to be honest. Then again im a depressed virgin at 21...

 

[Halo13]

No. I'm like a nun. Don't care much about sex.

 

[Final Escape]

I would avoid it if it was not how I paid the bills. I actually hate it but I know what the alternative is. A min wage job or three just to keep head above water. Unfortunately the promiscuity is driving me to ctb because I sometimes attach to clients but I know it's only sex. I'm also too old to start over though. So kinda trapped. Iam definitely considering ending it soon even if pple don't think this is enough reason to ctb. It's more than enough reason for me.

 

[Alchemist]

I would avoid it if it was not how I paid the bills. I actually hate it but I know what the alternative is. A min wage job or three just to keep head above water. Unfortunately the promiscuity is driving me to ctb because I sometimes attach to clients but I know it's only sex. I'm also too old to start over though. So kinda trapped. Iam definitely considering ending it soon even if pple don't think this is enough reason to ctb. It's more than enough reason for me.

Getting attached after sex must be really hard. Hell, attachment is hard even without sex. But hey, at least your job can bring happiness to some people, so I thank you for that.

 

[Only Me Here]

Didnt kiss a guy until i was 19 = 0
In my 20s i was Attractive and into the club scene so wooopied it up =25-30
In my 30s i was in 2 relationships and only had sex in those relationships =2
Sex was never an issue to get but yes i realized it creates attachments so at one point I just went without for 2 years
Now at 39 no interest at all...way too much work.

 

[Final Escape]

Getting attached after sex must be really hard. Hell, attachment is hard even without sex. But hey, at least your job can bring happiness to some people, so I thank you for that.

Right, they do leave happy. Lol!

 

[Only Me Here]

Right, they do leave happy. Lol!

I don't want to ask you anything too intrusive and if i do please feel free to tell me to stfu, but did you ever fall in love with one of them who loved you back?

That was my plan for a while. Sleep around, get drunk as fuck, destroy things, etc....

But now I'm old as fuck and decided I wanted my final times to be peaceful. But I'll still get drunk like I do all the time now.

Btw your pic is freaking me out lol

 

[RRH]

I would be if I wasn't socially awkward and could actually hold a decent conversation. I'm no Brad Pitt, but still have reasonable looks.

It's actually one of the reasons I want to ctb. Not the lack of sex, but being too introverted and unable to connect with people on a deeper level.

 

[offshoreserver]

have been very promiscuous for a very long time. sex is really the only thing i can do right and sometimes it feels better than hard drugs. i'm still "young" but doubt that anything could get in the way of me trying to fuck. if my life got any worse or if i somehow became unfuckable by normal people via getting too old or something i would find some freaky kink and perform it for whoever needed it. kink is easy. if things were any worse than they are now i would really have no reason to be cautious with anything. i might even welcome a death involving sex somehow more than even a peaceful suicide. if i could die for someone's gratification like that i would, and to go out exercising my full purpose instead of wasting away or blowing my head off would be exactly how i think i'd be meant to go. same way i came. but it probably won't get to happen, so here i am instead

 

[Empty Smile]

Btw your pic is freaking me out lol

Lmao.... Leave my eyeball alone!!!

That's basically why I put it here, cause I knew it would be creepy. Hell, even I kept looking at it because it was creepy.

 

[Alchemist]

Right, they do leave happy. Lol!

Lol I mean that is pretty like that at least one or two might be some poor schmuck like me who has no other means of having pgysical contact, so that brief time, even if it's out of financial need means the world to them.

Didnt kiss a guy until i was 19 = 0
In my 20s i was Attractive and into the club scene so wooopied it up =25-30
In my 30s i was in 2 relationships and only had sex in those relationships =2
Sex was never an issue to get but yes i realized it creates attachments so at one point I just went without for 2 years
Now at 39 no interest at all...way too much work.

Looks like you had your fair share lol. But it's true, it's hard to not form a connection with someone during sex, maybe that's where the craving comes from.

 

[Final Escape]

Didnt kiss a guy until i was 19 = 0
In my 20s i was Attractive and into the club scene so wooopied it up =25-30
In my 30s i was in 2 relationships and only had sex in those relationships =2
Sex was never an issue to get but yes i realized it creates attachments so at one point I just went without for 2 years
Now at 39 no interest at all...way too much work.

Why no interest?

I don't want to ask you anything too intrusive and if i do please feel free to tell me to stfu, but did you ever fall in love with one of them who loved you back?

Btw your pic is freaking me out lol

I did fall in love with some over the years but no, none of them loved me back. Or if they liked me they probably felt uncomfortable with getting too involved because of what I do. I had a client like this recently, he was coming around a lot but then decided to stop seeing me. He was honest about why and it wasn't like an ugly scene but I was sad.

 

[Only Me Here]

Why no interest?

I did fall in love with some over the years but no, none of them loved me back. Or if they liked me they probably felt uncomfortable with getting too involved because of what I do. I had a client like this recently, he was coming around a lot but then decided to stop seeing me. He was honest about why and it wasn't like an ugly scene but I was sad.

No interest because im highly self concious, i was the type who always had to work out and have everything perfect, down to a good wax. not a single thing out of place and i still felt highly conscious of myself. considering im struggling to do Basic tasks these days thats far too much work. Plus i think the feeling would bring me back to life and i need to stay numb to get out of here...if that makes sense. I also cannot risk getting attached...

 

[Alchemist]

Why no interest?

I did fall in love with some over the years but no, none of them loved me back. Or if they liked me they probably felt uncomfortable with getting too involved because of what I do. I had a client like this recently, he was coming around a lot but then decided to stop seeing me. He was honest about why and it wasn't like an ugly scene but I was sad.

Who knows? Maybe they did love you, but seems to be a taboo to form an emotional connection so they try it to keep it professional to avoid anyone getting hurt.

 

[Empty Smile]

@Only Me Here

I love the quote under your name!

 

[Angst Filled Fuck Up]

Not promiscuous per se but over the years I haven't been too hung up about talking to multiple girls at once or kissing/cheating occasionally. I haven't done anything like that for some time but in the past I didn't have too many scruples like that and often needed validation.

 

[Only Me Here]

@Only Me Here

I love the quote under your name!

Thanks...i think it is what gets most people here through every night.

 

[Empty Smile]

Thanks...i think it is what gets most people here through every night.

I agree. It also reminds me of my favorite saying:

Death isn't the greatest loss in life. The greatest loss is what dies inside us while we live.

 

[Halo13]

Thanks...i think it is what gets most people here through every night.

I think that's true

 

[Donewitheverything]

I only had sex with one person in my 23 years of existence, my ex. And to be honest, I have no desire to be promiscuous as I find hook-up culture to be revolting and hence why I've always been apprehensive about the current dating scene. Most people around my age just want to get their rocks off rather than actually have a lasting commitment. I get why that is, but it's not my cup of tea as I'm fairly traditional when it comes love and sex.

 

[Final Escape]

No interest because im highly self concious, i was the type who always had to work out and have everything perfect, down to a good wax. not a single thing out of place and i still felt highly conscious of myself. considering im struggling to do Basic tasks these days thats far too much work. Plus i think the feeling would bring me back to life and i need to stay numb to get out of here...if that makes sense. I also cannot risk getting attached...

I'm sorry sweetheart. I sympathize, I struggle with my everyday too. Yea getting attached can really cause immense pain, especially if it occurs outside of a healthy context. I'm surprised I'm not more hurt by this recent event. Ok maybe because I'm working to get the N and I'm relieved I won't be around that much longer? There's a relief and detachment when u decide to check out.

 

[Halo13]

I'm sorry sweetheart. I sympathize, I struggle with my everyday too. Yea getting attached can really cause immense pain, especially if it occurs outside of a healthy context. I'm surprised I'm not more hurt by this recent event. Ok maybe because I'm working to get the N and I'm relieved I won't be around that much longer? There's a relief and detachment when u decide to check out.

I agree there's a relief and detachment. I've been asked very recently how I don't get bothered by things and cope with life. (Ironic, isn't it?). I said I just don't care anymore - that's the absolute truth. Nothing can stop me because I really, truly stopped caring once I decided to ctb. So much just feels so irrelevant it is almost funny. I still have my moments and would like to help others while I'm still here, though. Just don't care about what happens to me. There's a comfort in it.

Lmao.... Leave my eyeball alone!!!

That's basically why I put it here, cause I knew it would be creepy. Hell, even I kept looking at it because it was creepy.

Haha I was creeped out by it reading this, especially at night. Funny it bugs others.

 

[AngelGirl]

i never had a rebellious phase in my teenage years. but now i'm truly losing all my marbles or any sort of care about keeping my life to be seemingly normal so i'm starting to sleep around. next is probably doing drugs. i literally don't care because i'm planning to kill myself soon anyways. i feel like a stranger. but i want to feel it all before i die.

I was like you somewhat when I was a teenager. I had very low self esteem so I slept around. I always felt that I'm disgusting. I wanted to harm myself because I felt that I am a disgusting person and my body is also so disgusting. I also wanted to punish myself, wanted to destroy myself, etc. I also felt that I am promiscuous and it also made me feel bad about myself and made me even more self destructive. It was just a shitty cycle.

I'm still a very low self esteem person but I don't sleep around anymore. I think it ceased because my social anxiety started to get worse and I started avoiding everyone just all together.

But what really helped me was having a boyfriend. My boyfriend then was really supportive and being with someone who is actually loving and respectful really helped me a lot with my depression. I met him at a bar and I hooked up with him the same night. I didn't think I would be in a relationship with him since I have never been in a relationship before and I was never respected from guys I had sex with til then.

Now I'm not with him anymore but now I have way more respect for myself and my body because having memories of being respected made me do the same for myself.

So maybe try to start an actual relationship? I know it can be hard.. cause I was there also but I think it would definitely help.

 

[sunny.sativa]

Y'know what's odd, I'm flirty and flaunty until it actually comes to getting attention that surpasses a wink and gestures. I'd grind on someone at the club, or give them an obvious look-down ...but I don't want to speak to them ever again after that.
I might even compliment a man on his physique or tattoos, accept his phone number, and throw it away.

If I'm gonna sleep with someone, they have to charm me and taunt me a bit until I'll take the bait. I'm not gonna spout on about my embarrassingly delusory standards, but I guess, yeah?
To an extent? Like sex doesn't mean much to me, it's just for funsies or whatever but I'm still picky. Unfortunately. Wish I wasn't, cause that shit rocks.

Does sex numb you?