Living apart would be my ideal, I reckon, but it's just not really 'done', long-term.
Idk, would you say 5 years is long-term? That was my first relationship, we never moved in together, because we simply couldn't afford to move out of our parent's places, even by adding our salaries together (embarrassing...). So I guess it is possible.
I've got a feeling the closer you get (i.e. literally, through living together or even marriage) the more you'll just end up resenting.
You're kind of right, although it doesn't necessary has to be *really* bad. It's just that we're all different and ultimately every other person will have their own traits, quirks etc. that will rub you the wrong way, and the more time you two are spending together the more these traits will upset/annoy/unnerve you. When people are dating, especially when they are in love/in lust/infatuated with each other, they are trying to be their best selves whenever they're together. However, it is impossible to remain your best self 24/7. A person that lives with you will be in a bad mood, tired, sick etc. and you'll have to learn to live with it.
However, it is possible to find a person that isn't going to
really rub you the wrong way and live with them comfortably, with little to no conflict or resentment. You just have to have realistic expectations and realize it's not going to be like a non-stop 24/7 romantic date. You don't have to conform to what is expected by society, you just have to be honest about your own expectations, listen to the other persons, and see if there can be a compromise you both are going to be comfortable with.