I was diagnosed with it once about 10 years ago, I don't know if I'd still be diagnosed with it but I'm convinced I still have it. It's like a wrecking ball going through my life
I never been diagnosed but I fit the criterias all too well and undeniably. I have no other word for it but deliblitating painful shame.
The fact you have doubts means you improved. That's good.
Do you go out of your way to not be seen by people you know when you are out of your house? I do that, what does it mean? Deep internalized shame? How did it originate? How to get rid of this plague so you don't have to kill yourself?
Excessive avoidance of social situations even simple interractions.
I' m not an expert but it undeniably steems from deep internalized shame. Basicly you have so much fears of being judged and humiliated for things you deemed wrong about you. Could be for multiple reasons at once. Multiple fears at the same time . And most likely nobody acknowledged your fears or concerns. Probably, if not certainly, because of childhood neglect and unvalidation.
Its indeed a plague.
I' m sure some people improve and learn how to face their fears.
Maybe anxiety meds can help too.
Therapy etc..
Personaly I feel clueless and trapped.