anyone willing to chat?

[brbr]

Idk if I can make this thread (sorry if I can't, i'm new here), but I'm drunk af (it is one of the few moments when I don't feel like a piece of shit that just wants to die) and i'm willing to chat about methods, life in general, random stuff, etc. Anyone's online? :)

 

[GAKitty]

Yeah, I don't know how the forum creation process is moderated, but I'm more than willing to chat!

 

[brbr]

Yeah, I don't know how the forum creation process is moderated, but I'm more than willing to chat!

Hi, how are you?
(Idk how to sent a private message, so yeah, lets chat here lol)

 

[GAKitty]

Hi, how are you?
(Idk how to sent a private message, so yeah, lets chat here lol)

Same here, I think you have to reply on a lot of forums before you can pm (to prevent spam I guess).
But yeah, kind of shit. Didn't do anything again today (I've tried in the past and it feels like everything I do ends in failure). How are you?

 

[ArtVandelay]

@brbr What are you drinking?

 

[brbr]

Same here, I think you have to reply on a lot of forums before you can pm (to prevent spam I guess).
But yeah, kind of shit. Didn't do anything again today (I've tried in the past and it feels like everything I do ends in failure). How are you?

yeah, I think I can't chat or pm yet
I'm in a deep shitty hole tbh, but right now i'm drunk and on drugs so I feel a little bit better (at leats i don't feel that annoying constant pain). Oh, i see, i didn't do anything today either. Actually I don't do shit, just stare at the wall and cry every day. Are going to CTB soon? What's your preferred method?

@brbr What are you drinking?

cheap beer and wine lol
its almost midnight here and i've been drinking since 6 PM
@ArtVandelay how are you?

 

[ArtVandelay]

cheap beer and wine lol
its almost midnight here and i've been drinking since 6 PM
@ArtVandelay how are you?

Nice, cheap beer is the best. I'm recovering from knee surgery so I'm not supposed to drink anything unfortunately. I'm doing alright but I've had extreme hiccups the past couple days, which is actually causing me more pain than my knee lol. I've just been chillin listening to Kitboga scambaiting prank calls on youtube. Really entertaining. You got any plans for the upcoming week?

 

[GAKitty]

yeah, I think I can't chat or pm yet
I'm in a deep shitty hole tbh, but right now i'm drunk and on drugs so I feel a little bit better (at leats i don't feel that annoying constant pain). Oh, i see, i didn't do anything today either. Actually I don't do shit, just stare at the wall and cry every day. Are going to CTB soon? What's your preferred method?

cheap beer and wine lol
its almost midnight here and i've been drinking since 6 PM
@ArtVandelay how are you?

Yeah, I feel you. I live with my dad, so my only immediate method would be slitting my throat with one of the sharper knives in the kitchen, but that would likely take too long and I don't want to feel pain, so eh. A gun would be preferable, but I'm too lazy to go out and buy one.

 

[brbr]

Nice, cheap beer is the best. I'm recovering from knee surgery so I'm not supposed to drink anything unfortunately. I'm doing alright but I've had extreme hiccups the past couple days, which is actually causing me more pain than my knee lol. I've just been chillin listening to Kitboga scambaiting prank calls on youtube. Really entertaining. You got any plans for the upcoming week?

Yeah, I get really drunk for least than 10 dollars lol
Oh, I'm sorry for that :/ Hope you gets better soon :)
Nope, I don't do nothing/talk to anyone, my life it's just a tedious monotony lol. I'll just wait for the next weekend so I can get really drunk/high again, drugs really cuts my pain off. And you, any plans?

Yeah, I feel you. I live with my dad, so my only immediate method would be slitting my throat with one of the sharper knives in the kitchen, but that would likely take too long and I don't want to feel pain, so eh. A gun would be preferable, but I'm too lazy to go out and buy one.

Yeah, I see. I don't want to die with a painfull method either. Where do you live? At leats you can have access to a gun lol. Where I live I can't get a gun or N or SN, nothing. I'm really stuck in life, I want to kill myself but don't have a proper method and that sucks lol

 

[Garyjd]

Yeah, I get really drunk for least than 10 dollars lol
Oh, I'm sorry for that :/ Hope you gets better soon :)
Nope, I don't do nothing/talk to anyone, my life it's just a tedious monotony lol. I'll just wait for the next weekend so I can get really drunk/high again, drugs really cuts my pain off. And you, any plans?


Yeah, I see. I don't want to die with a painfull method either. Where do you live? At leats you can have access to a gun lol. Where I live I can't get a gun or N or SN, nothing. I'm really stuck in life, I want to kill myself but don't have a proper method and that sucks lol

I agree, no point going out in a painful way, we have all endured enough of that

 

[brbr]

I agree, no point going out in a painful way, we have all endured enough of that

Yeah, if i wanted to feel pain i'll just stay alive lol

 

[ArtVandelay]

Yeah, I get really drunk for least than 10 dollars lol
Oh, I'm sorry for that :/ Hope you gets better soon :)
Nope, I don't do nothing/talk to anyone, my life it's just a tedious monotony lol. I'll just wait for the next weekend so I can get really drunk/high again, drugs really cuts my pain off. And you, any plans?

Thanks. I don't do anything or talk to anyone either lol. I'll have to start doing physical therapy again for my knee which is something to look forward to I guess. Better than staying at home all day. It's not fun but it makes me feel like I have a goal and am working towards something.

What kind of drugs do you like?

 

[brbr]

Thanks. I don't do anything or talk to anyone either lol. I'll have to start doing physical therapy again for my knee which is something to look forward to I guess. Better than staying at home all day. It's not fun but it makes me feel like I have a goal and am working towards something.

What kind of drugs do you like?

Physical exercise is pretty great. I like it a lot. It makes you feel better, helps you sleep and it's something to do lol. if I had money i'll
certainly go to gym.
Oh, I love alcohol and weed. I smoke weed every day (it helps me fall asleep and relax) and drink every weekend. But I also like stimulants (all of them, Coke, MDMA, Ritalin, Venvanse, etc), at leats for a few hours they make the pain go away and gives you the illusion that life is worth living lol. But they also have a high price, so I don't do very often. And you, do you do any drug to relief the pain?

 

[ArtVandelay]

Physical exercise is pretty great. I like it a lot. It makes you feel better, helps you sleep and it's something to do lol. if I had money i'll
certainly go to gym.
Oh, I love alcohol and weed. I smoke weed every day (it helps me fall asleep and relax) and drink every weekend. But I also like stimulants (all of them, Coke, MDMA, Ritalin, Venvanse, etc), at leats for a few hours they make the pain go away and gives you the illusion that life is worth living lol. But they also have a high price, so I don't do very often. And you, do you do any drug to relief the pain?

Weed was my drug of choice from age 13 until 28. I smoked pretty much every day for 15 years. For most of that time I was taking adderall daily along with it. Great combination, although I'm pretty sure I have some kind of permanent brain damage from the adderall. I always had a prescription but I would abuse it, often taking more than double what I'm supposed to. I eventually got burnt out and quit them both. They didn't have much effect anymore except for making me really tired and depressed. I'm mostly straight edge nowadays. I really like running...hoping to be able to do that again after my knee heals. I had to stop after tearing my ACL, which is what the surgery is supposed to fix.

 

[brbr]

Weed was my drug of choice from age 13 until 28. I smoked pretty much every day for 15 years. For most of that time I was taking adderall daily along with it. Great combination, although I'm pretty sure I have some kind of permanent brain damage from the adderall. I always had a prescription but I would abuse it, often taking more than double what I'm supposed to. I eventually got burnt out and quit them both. They didn't have much effect anymore except for making me really tired and depressed. I'm mostly straight edge nowadays. I really like running...hoping to be able to do that again after my knee heals. I had to stop after tearing my ACL, which is what the surgery is supposed to fix.

I love weed, it really helps me. I know it's a form of escapism but by now it's really helping me to go through this shity life. I never took adderal, where I live we don't have it. ADHD meds are really fucked up and they have a very high price, I understand when you say you've had brain damage. Where I live we only have ritalin and venvanse, i took both. Glad i'm free of them cause I have an addictive personality. Used to snort ritalin, had amazing moments with it. I'm sorry for asking, but why do you want to CTB? And do you plan to make it soon?
Oh, and running is great. If I had motivation to just go out and run randomly i'll do it, but i'm strugguling a lot rn :(

 

[brbr]

Ok, so idk how to delete this lol
But this is it, thank you guys for chating with me, I appreciated a lot ;)

 

[ArtVandelay]

I love weed, it really helps me. I know it's a form of escapism but by now it's really helping me to go through this shity life. I never took adderal, where I live we don't have it. ADHD meds are really fucked up and they have a very high price, I understand when you say you've had brain damage. Where I live we only have ritalin and venvanse, i took both. Glad i'm free of them cause I have an addictive personality. Used to snort ritalin, had amazing moments with it. I'm sorry for asking, but why do you want to CTB? And do you plan to make it soon?
Oh, and running is great. If I had motivation to just go out and run randomly i'll do it, but i'm strugguling a lot rn :(

I'm not sure I have a good answer on why I want to CTB...just don't really get any enjoyment out of life. Severe social anxiety, really uncomfortable around people. No job and and no motivation to find one. Lack of motivation is definitely related to my history of abusing adderall. I used to be really ambitious, but somewhere along the line I stopped caring about everything. I'm really lucky that my parents support me, even though I have an advanced degree and could get a job if I cared enough to look for one. I'm waiting until my 30th birthday in October to CTB. If I go through with it, I'll use inert gas with exit bag.

Running is a dangerous addiction lol. Once you build up a little endurance and make it a habit, it's really hard to stop. That's actually how I injured my knee, I was so hooked on the endorphin rush that I wouldn't give my muscles enough time to heal, and would run no matter how painful it was.

Ok, so idk how to delete this lol
But this is it, thank you guys for chating with me, I appreciated a lot ;)

Thanks, I enjoyed it too. Sorry for taking so long to respond, your questions were thought provoking and it took me a while to find the right words lol.

 

[WaitingP]

Hope you're doing ok