Help Anyone here addicted to opioids?

[RC90]

I was wondering if any of you are addicted to opioids, I'm severely hooked on Suboxone, for months I was taking 2mg only. But lately I've been taking 8mg-21mg. Makes me feel good, but I know it's wrong. if anyone is going through the same please get in touch.

 

[mathieu]

I used to be on Suboxone, although not for opioid addiction, I just wasn't able to get my pain meds for a while so it was replaced with that. I hated it, I would get interdose withdrawals. It didn't last 24 hours for me. I don't take any opioids now. I would get high off them but my tolerance is so high I'd need to shoot up and I don't know how.

 

[RC90]

I used to be on Suboxone, although not for opioid addiction, I just wasn't able to get my pain meds for a while so it was replaced with that. I hated it, I would get interdose withdrawals. It didn't last 24 hours for me. I don't take any opioids now. I would get high off them but my tolerance is so high I'd need to shoot up and I don't know how.

I'm so jealous of you. I was doing so well for months with 2mg. But lately been taking very high doses, mostly because of boredom and makes me happy and gives me energy. Good on ya, thanks for your reply.

I used to be on Suboxone, although not for opioid addiction, I just wasn't able to get my pain meds for a while so it was replaced with that. I hated it, I would get interdose withdrawals. It didn't last 24 hours for me. I don't take any opioids now. I would get high off them but my tolerance is so high I'd need to shoot up and I don't know how.

Did you tamper ou just quit cold turkey?

 

[grungeCat]

I am very addicted to codeine. I managed to stay clean for some period of time but now when I have a complete breakdown I get back to it. I used to do tramadol, oxycodone, morphine but I don't have access to them anymore. Codeine is easy to get in country where I live.

 

[RC90]

I am very addicted to codeine. I managed to stay clean for some period of time but now when I have a complete breakdown I get back to it. I used to do tramadol, oxycodone, morphine but I don't have access to them anymore. Codeine is easy to get in country where I live.

Oh grunge that's why I'm taking Suboxone, I used to take 30 Tramadol pills. For years and years. So when I told my doctor and family of this the doctor put me on Suboxone. Much better than taking 30 trams everyday. Codeine is slightly less powerful than codeine though. Good luck in your struggle and thanks for sharing it with me.

 

[Infinite Conscious]

I was on heroin for 16 years of my life (at first for 9 years, then 9 years off, then made the fatal mistake of relapsing and continued for another 7 years).
Not really a hard-core IV-syringe dependence (although it used to be for some 4-5 years in the first "round"), but still a habit that overwhelms every life and shreds it into pieces forever.

The strangest thing about opiate addiction is that it causes real pleasure only in the first month or so (perhaps even less, a couple of weeks).
Everything after that is taking the stuff just to feel normal and functioning.

I feel like I have to pay for the air I breathe... the habit becomes an opsession, it no longer has any effect other than making us feel just "normal", the way the rest of the world feels without using anything at all.
Literally paying for the fucking oxygen.
So sad.
Nothing can ruin a life so fast and so much as opiates.

Opiates make all people, no matter who they were and how good they used to be, into the same - Frankenstein.
The habit becomes more important than love, family, honor, dignity, and all other characteristics that make us human.
Good people become bad people... it is astounding how those drugs devour previously the kindest and most loving individuals.

And quite often it is very smart and intelligent people who become users.
In a private rehab center I used to go to, there were more college degrees among the patients than among the staff.
I have a psychology degree myself... chose psychology to try to help myself.
Although I could help others, I never could apply the knowledge in helping - me.

 

[RC90]

I was on heroin for 16 years of my life (at first for 9 years, then 9 years off, then made the fatal mistake of relapsing and continued for another 7 years).
Not really a hard-core IV-syringe dependence (although it used to be for some 4-5 years in the first "round"), but still a habit that overwhelms every life and shreds it into pieces forever.

The strangest thing about opiate addiction is that it causes real pleasure only in the first month or so (perhaps even less, a couple of weeks).
Everything after that is taking the stuff just to feel normal and functioning.

I feel like I have to pay for the air I breathe... the habit becomes an opsession, it no longer has any effect other than making us feel just "normal", the way the rest of the world feels without using anything at all.
Literally paying for the fucking oxygen.
So sad.
Nothing can ruin a life so fast and so much as opiates.

Opiates make all people, no matter who they were and how good they used to be, into the same - Frankenstein.
The habit becomes more important than love, family, honor, dignity, and all other characteristics that make us human.
Good people become bad people... it is astounding how those drugs devour previously the kindest and most loving individuals.

And quite often it is very smart and intelligent people that become users.
In a private rehab center I used to go to, there were more college degrees among the patients than among the staff.
I have a psychology degree myself... chose psychology to try to help myself.
Although I could help others, I never could apply the knowledge in helping - me.

Oh wow. What a great story you became a psychologist and you are clean now, so you know the Wd I'm feeling, just took 2mg but my body wants more to feel normal. I just reject it. I'll try my best not to increase the dose. You are so right, it's the most intelligent caring people who become hooked. I was also in a rehab clinic but was state funded so it didn't help at all. 2 weeks of taking more than 30 pills a day, don't ask me what I took. All I remember is that for 2 weeks I was a zombie, the activities that made us do was for 6 years old, like colouring books and stuff. So I'm just going monthly to a drug center to get my monthly prescriptionS. Don't know if I ever will be clean. Even if go down to 1mg I will still have horrible Withdrawal .

 

[mathieu]

I'm so jealous of you. I was doing so well for months with 2mg. But lately been taking very high doses, mostly because of boredom and makes me happy and gives me energy. Good on ya, thanks for your reply.

Did you tamper ou just quit cold turkey?

I tapered. The medication I was on most of the time was buprenorphine patches so I tapered off those without any problems once my back pain got better. Since then I've used heroin, oxy or dilaudid a few times but stopped because I don't really enjoy it anymore.

 

[RC90]

Yeah heard oxys are really worse than anything else. Glad I never tried that. I get addicted to everthing so easily . Well done!

 

[grungeCat]

I was on heroin for 16 years of my life (at first for 9 years, then 9 years off, then made the fatal mistake of relapsing and continued for another 7 years).
Not really a hard-core IV-syringe dependence (although it used to be for some 4-5 years in the first "round"), but still a habit that overwhelms every life and shreds it into pieces forever.

The strangest thing about opiate addiction is that it causes real pleasure only in the first month or so (perhaps even less, a couple of weeks).
Everything after that is taking the stuff just to feel normal and functioning.

I feel like I have to pay for the air I breathe... the habit becomes an opsession, it no longer has any effect other than making us feel just "normal", the way the rest of the world feels without using anything at all.
Literally paying for the fucking oxygen.
So sad.
Nothing can ruin a life so fast and so much as opiates.

Opiates make all people, no matter who they were and how good they used to be, into the same - Frankenstein.
The habit becomes more important than love, family, honor, dignity, and all other characteristics that make us human.
Good people become bad people... it is astounding how those drugs devour previously the kindest and most loving individuals.

And quite often it is very smart and intelligent people who become users.
In a private rehab center I used to go to, there were more college degrees among the patients than among the staff.
I have a psychology degree myself... chose psychology to try to help myself.
Although I could help others, I never could apply the knowledge in helping - me.

Very well said... I remember how bad I became when I got hooked. I haven't done heroin but less powerful opiates/opioids were enough to completely change me. I started to steal money from the ones I love (even if there isn't many of them...), lie through my teeth, be aggressive and bitchy... Now it's only a little bit better. The biggest pain is that it's only my fault. It took me a lot of time to realise this. I've been on the rehab, psychologist but it didn't do much. I literally became a zombie. Now after loss of my mother I'm on the edge. I just have to keep doing this sh*t over and over.

 

[Infinite Conscious]

Oh wow. What a great story you became a psychologist and you are clean now, so you know the Wd I'm feeling, just took 2mg but my body wants more to feel normal. I just reject it. I'll try my best not to increase the dose. You are so right, it's the most intelligent caring people who become hooked. I was also in a rehab clinic but was state funded so it didn't help at all. 2 weeks of taking more than 30 pills a day, don't ask me what I took. All I remember is that for 2 weeks I was a zombie, the activities that made us do was for 6 years old, like colouring books and stuff. So I'm just going monthly to a drug center to get my monthly prescriptionS. Don't know if I ever will be clean. Even if go down to 1mg I will still have horrible Withdrawal .

Back in the days I was hooked the first time (ended in 2004), Buprenorphine was not so easily available, as I lived in a country where Subotex (a brand name) was really hard to get and had to be purchased from abroad... so I first tried it only a couple of years ago and don't have much experience with it. I used it only in the first several days to ease the physical symptoms of withdrawal, and a long-term use of the particular medicine always seemed to me as unnecessary and just as bad as staying on heroin. But maybe I am wrong, as many individuals claim that Buprenorphine "saved their lives". But they are still dependent on an opioid and face just as strong withdrawal, perhaps even worse, than in getting off heroin.

What I did find out, though, is that taking 4mg can have the same effect as taking 20mg, for example. People usually demand higher doses, but there is no real difference in how the body feels... maybe in the mind they are more calm when they know they took 16mg (2 x 8mg tablets), but the withdrawal symptoms may have been "taken care of" even with 4mg (half a tablet of 8mg). It's all in the head of the patient.

I wholeheartedly advise you to slowly get off Buprenorphine.
Cut your current doses down, this is just a mood swing you're going through, totally unnecessary and very manageable. In a few days you should be able to be at 8mg. In less than a month, you can be back at 2mg.
Then, 2mg is really not that much, I personally don't even feel anything when I take it, but I get it that your body is used to it and would crave if you suddenly stop.
Cut it down slowly, divide the pill into 4 small (really small, I get it) pieces, and start with 3/4... then after some time 2/4 (1mg), then 1/4... and eventually it will get bearable. Of course, you need the motivation. If you are on this forum, that makes it so much more difficult. But if you are young and still have hopes that your life might get better, gather some strength and will to do this.

You will feel much better about yourself once you win this battle. Then you could say - if I beat an opiate addiction, I am a winner! It's not an easy task. And there are really no benefits and no purpose in staying on 1-2mg of Buprenorphine, you don't get high or feel any pleasure, it is only an unnecessary burden. Get off of it. Of course you can do it.

I know it's hard to stay clean... but in your case it's better to find some substitute and occasionally get high, than to stay on such small doses of Suboxone (the same as Buprenorphine). I wish you good luck, and if you ever need some advice or encouragement, I will be here for some time, until I myself gather the courage to CTB.

Very well said... I remember how bad I became when I got hooked. I haven't done heroin but less powerful opiates/opioids were enough to completely change me. I started to steal money from the ones I love (even if there isn't many of them...), lie through my teeth, be aggressive and bitchy... Now it's only a little bit better. The biggest pain is that it's only my fault. It took me a lot of time to realise this. I've been on the rehab, psychologist but it didn't do much. I literally became a zombie. Now after loss of my mother I'm on the edge. I just have to keep doing this sh*t over and over.

I get you, bro... (I suppose you are male, sorry if I got that wrong).
I know how difficult it is to stop.
Try to find some other substitute, other than opiates, at least for some time, so your body can reset.
I fully understand it's much easier said than done, but... it is possible.
If it was you who wrote on another thread that your relationship with opioids keeps you from CTB... then - forget my remarks. :)
If they keep you alive, then - you know...
If you are in a position to do it - try to find some IBOGAINE... it is a plant (Iboga) from Africa, which helped many heroin addicts end their addiction.
Ayahuasca can have similar, life-changing effects, but particularly for opiates - Ibogaine does miracles.