Anyone feels like it's easier to not cbt

[Ilpiccoloskywalker]

I mean everyone blaming sucidal people as the one that want to take the easy road in life.
It's much easier to stick to the same stupid routine than actually commit suicide(get up go to work watch some youtube repeat). It takes so much balls to actually do it.
I don't know if killing myself would be the right thing.
I just feel no reason to live, i feel no joy, never, so everything is a burden.
The only thing i'm looking forward is going to bed, forever.
Everything is so hard and the same can be said for killing oneself. So i just keep on doing nothing that feels significant.

 

[Intelligent Ape]

Agree. I've watched TV series, played PC and thought that I can run away from myself forever. And now what? Life is here, depression is here. But I don't want to come back.

 

[TheEndof]

Yeah, I used to think I could be able to live the rest of my life in misery because it's easier than CBT and all that comes with death. Things used to be somewhat bearable. Now, I don't think I can. It's still easier to just go on with the same routine, but it's so painful now. Sometimes I think it is just easier to CBT. But I'm still here.... so apparently not.

 

[MysticPerception]

I'd say it definitely requires a whole lot of courage and strength to finally ctb. It's not an easy choice to make or easy to do in any way shape or form. However for me personally I find it much easier to do rather than continuing to suffer. I'm genuinely looking forward to the day I do it and think it will come much easier to me compared to living for the rest of my life feeling empty and miserable.

 

[Alec]

I mean everyone blaming sucidal people as the one that want to take the easy road in life.
It's much easier to stick to the same stupid routine than actually commit suicide(get up go to work watch some youtube repeat). It takes so much balls to actually do it.
I don't know if killing myself would be the right thing.
I just feel no reason to live, i feel no joy, never, so everything is a burden.
The only thing i'm looking forward is going to bed, forever.
Everything is so hard and the same can be said for killing oneself. So i just keep on doing nothing that feels significant.

I feel this way too, nothing makes me feel good and I don't know and frankly doubt anything in this world at all could ever make me happy. And it's so FUCKING meaningless to just go to work - sleep - work and so on and so on. And yes, sometimes when my surviving instinct gets too strong I feel the same as you that it would just be easier to keep doing this on repeat. But then I think about how meaning and BORING it is and how it is killing my soul and I think that killing myself is better. Honestly I'm starting to think that maybe I should just be brave, because I definitely don't want to live a meaningless life, and we ARE going to die in the end anyway. And about what others will think, it's hard to back this up with action and attitude rather than just say it but still FUCK OTHERS, especially if I'll be dead... I don't know

 

[AintNoWayOut]

depends... like, at the moment, i dont have many good ways of going about it and its a challenge to find the most reliable way, the most accessible way, etc so i and many others just kinda put it off and continue the daily grind until they find the energy and/or courage to go through with something. but if i had a gun by my side right now, im sure i'd put it to my head and pull the trigger without much hesitation. it'd take some guts, sure, but given my situation where i endure physical pain every day, it'd be much easier than continuing to live this way. thats why im suicidal, because life has become a constant struggle for me. its very rare that im actually able to be content, or enjoying something, because the pain overrides most good feelings.

tbh if there where was some sort of logoff button, which you press and guarantees you die painlessly AND you cease to exist with no chance of being punished in an afterlife, i believe suicide rates would go up at least ten fold. for most people the issue is a fear of failure/pain, and the fear of uncertainty of what happens after this life ends. take those out of the equation, and it'd be the much much MUCH easier choice for many. hell, i would've pressed that button years ago.

 

[S1mpleme]

I mean everyone blaming sucidal people as the one that want to take the easy road in life.
It's much easier to stick to the same stupid routine than actually commit suicide(get up go to work watch some youtube repeat). It takes so much balls to actually do it.
I don't know if killing myself would be the right thing.
I just feel no reason to live, i feel no joy, never, so everything is a burden.
The only thing i'm looking forward is going to bed, forever.
Everything is so hard and the same can be said for killing oneself. So i just keep on doing nothing that feels significant.

Watching YouTube sounds easy, but sometimes it hurts so bad, that CTB feels like pain relief. Try to watch YouTube when your tooth hurts unstoppable.

 

[AintNoWayOut]

Watching YouTube sounds easy, but sometimes it hurts so bad, that CTB feels like pain relief. Try to watch YouTube when your tooth hurts unstoppable.

for real, when dealing with physical pain its impossible to just avoid life's problems because the problem is your OWN body, which death is the only escape from. you can never even be in neutral territory, forget positive. life is unbearable this way.

 

[enjoy]

even though i have a date set, i feel like i'm constantly putting it off. i'm the laziest person i know. like... i literally procrastinate taking a piss sometimes.

 

[CynicalHopelessness]

Overriding your survival instincts is really hard.


About a year and a half ago I've opened my window, crawled on the sill and looked down, contemplating jumping. This was probably the lowest point I hit with my depression - for several weeks prior to this I was unmotivated to do anything, literally. When I came from work, I just laid down on the floor, sometimes crying.

The terror I've experienced was severe. I only managed to last few minutes before I backed off, and it was enough to make me finally try therapy.

I think it takes a significant willpower to override one's instincts. I've tried water fasting for several days some time afterwards, and it wasn't anywhere near that, but it was still extremely difficult. Out of my fasting attempts, I've succeeded twice out of seven times I've tried. The hunger in first days becomes so strong and overwhelming, and you need to constantly resist it.

Still, I know several people who'd label me "weak" for wishing for a way out, who also contemplate dieting all the time and do nothing except get more fat.

I think "weak" is just a label. A way for regular people to dismiss those who crossed the line, because if they were to dig too deep, they'd be grieving and maybe at risk of suicide themselves. It only works for people you don't care much about to begin with, though.

 

[Trisolaris]

None is easier. Living a life that is painful physically/mentally is hard, especially when you envision yourself doing it until old age. On the other hand, CTB is very hard in itself with its logistics, overcoming SI, and thinking what it would do to others. Really, this kind of existence and inner debate is torture. Nowadays, the only things that give me some comfort is going to bed and contemplating CTB.

 

[Farmmaa]

It would be easier for others if I stayed. It would be easier for me to stay and not have to think about the devastation I will be causing my family.
That's really the only hard part of this for me - knowing how much I'm hurting the people I love.

Living with chronic pain is hard. Watching your nerve damage slowly destroying your body is hard. Stress and anxiety every day, day after day because you can't pay your bills and you're drowning in debt is hard.

There is no easy.

 

[Heart of Ice]

If one is really suffering, it takes significantly more courage to keep living than to die.

 

[Pale Blue Dot]

If everything is so hard and I have to choose among one of those, why don't I gonna choose something that can completely stops any other agony after doing it?

 

[Nnana]

I think so. I'm terrified of death. I think evolution is a disgrace. It created humans to suffer horribly and then it created mechanisms that make it almost impossible for humans to escape this awful predicament, so they survive and procreate another wretched beings for no reason. Survival instincts and fear of death are torturing. But if you think rationally there's nothing to fear. There's nothing to fear being unconscious. That's what we were before being born. Most things in the universe lie unconscious of itself. Fear of death is stupid. There's nothing to fear.