Anyone else scared to take sn

[DreamEnd]

I read that other thread about failing sn and have my doubts about it. I don't want to wake up with a headache and not dead. Anyone else feel the same?

 

[LittleBlackCat]

I'm terrified. I have it but I don't think it's my method anymore. I'm scared of the fast heartbeat and vomiting, mostly

 

[DreamEnd]

I'm terrified. I have it but I don't think it's my method anymore. I'm scared of the fast heartbeat and vomiting, mostly

What is your method if you don't mind me asking?

 

[stilhavinightmares]

I'm also terrified of failing and having to endure awful pain and discomfort.

 

[Ellipsis]

I read that other thread about failing sn and have my doubts about it. I don't want to wake up with a headache and not dead. Anyone else feel the same?

I feel the same. I'm ready to feel discomfort: nausea, vomiting, stomach aches but I'm really afraid of dying and suffering for hours. I would pass out 10 minutes after swallowing the SN. I know I'm going to do it, my CTB decision is irrevocable but it's still scary. Especially when you see the stories of failed attempts and what those people felt.
I try to reassure myself by telling myself that I am organized and that I have everything at my disposal: SN, benzo, antiemetics, painkillers.

 

[DarkRose]

read that thread too. We can't be sure if what she said was true though. I still have my hopes about SN.

 

[Forever Sleep]

Yes, I'm scared but I'm hoping that following the protocol as closely as possible would give the best chance of success. There's still enormous risk of course but there is with most methods sadly.

I think a few things seem to have definitely made it more likely an attempt will fail- so I'm trying to do (or not do) the following:

Avoid opening the air tight packet until I am ready to use it.

Test it just before I use it via the blood test and aquarium test.

Considering doing either the two or maybe three day protocol version to build the metoclopramide up in my system.

Food and water fast overnight to ensure I'm fully prepared- maybe try and swallow the pills without water... I have seen other people manage to do that. (Not in an attempt of course!)

Measure the SN and water carefully and make up 3-4 glasses.

Chug the first one down in one.

It's awful to hear about horrific failed attempts. I guess none of us really know we'll have the guts to do it till the time comes. Still, I guess I try and reassure myself that lots of people have been successful with this method- most especially when they have followed the guide.

 

[Mofreeko]

I'm a lot less scared than I used to be. The need to leave is starting to outweigh it.

 

[je.suis.prêt]

Terrified of dying. I know I will panic the second I drink it (if I even get that far).

 

[Judy Garland]

I'm afraid of failing too. I don't' want to spend days in agony, sick from failure. I can't take this life anymore though. My plans are set and I'm going to do it soon. That post freaked me out too. I'm afraid of waking up dizzy, nauseous, dry heaving, and the massive headache. I really hope that doesn't happen to me.

 

[DreamEnd]

I'm afraid of failing too. I don't' want to spend days in agony, sick from failure. I can't take this life anymore though. My plans are set and I'm going to do it soon. That post freaked me out too. I'm afraid of waking up dizzy, nauseous, dry heaving, and the massive headache. I really hope that doesn't happen to me.

same here, its just so scary how it affects people differently.

 

[jessisme]

I'm most afraid of not losing consciousness and being aware of my body as it is shutting down. I am also afraid of having a heart attack as I have read that the tachycardia can result in cardiac arrest.

 

[NoLightRemains]

I'm nervous about being able to get a second glass down incase I throw up the first. That seemed to be the big flaw in the recent failed SN thread. I'm confident if I test my SN and keep enough down, I will die. I'm just trying to prepare for the possibility of it being extremely unpleasant. Planning on 20g first glass to reduce chance of vomiting (20g is plenty for my size). Then I will have 2 backup glasses of 25g each.

 

[LonelyEmerald]

no. shotguns are just way better

 

[born2win]

You should read on the medic guy who drank SN with coke. He documented it here, i just forgot the title or his name. It's around here..

Anyway, it worked on him even on 10gms, he had everything prepared and has called an ambulance as well, but it's interesting since he has documented it thoroughly. His conclusion was that it was painless and deadly. It's still my method after discarding rope hanging and CO poisoning.
I found it https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/testing-sn-how-to-get-to-hospital-fast.74903/
anyway, it's not 10gms it's 2gms, he's still active. Maybe you can check his posts or ask him personally.

 

[Zegers]

maybe try and swallow the pills without water...

Trying to swallow like 60 pills without water is too difficult but not impossible.

it worked on him even on 10gms

It was 2g i think.

what makes me panicky is to go on in this hell route indefinitely.

 

[SamTam33]

I'm not scared of the SN experience, per se - but I'm petrified of surviving.

Surviving another attempt is going to send me over the edge.

Also, I'm the 1 person when the odds of something are 1:231,845

Not the good odds like winning the lottery. No.

If the odds are that 1 in 10M goes blind or 1 in 5M develops kidney stones - that's me.

I wish I'd recorded some of these incidents over my lifetime, because they happen so frequently that I've lost count.

Not too long ago, I knew I was going to get into a car accident about 5 minutes before it happened. I did a dance in my front window during a thunderstorm begging to get struck by lightning. As soon as I walked away from the window, lightning struck the tree in my front yard and split it in half.

I had a dream about a co-worker's daughter that I didn't even know existed. The next day I asked her if she knew someone named Sandra because I had a dream she was stuck in a tornado and didn't want to come inside to get out of it.

She was quiet on the phone for a long time. Then started crying and said, "My daughter's name is Sandra... She's in an abusive relationship but refuses to leave her husband." I didn't even know she had a daughter. She would call me all the time after that asking if I had any other dreams.

I just know shit.

I've been like this all my life. My dad swears I'm manifesting the scenarios with my mind and my mom thinks I inherited some sixth sense from a great-aunt that used to be the same way LOL.

I know that if I drink it I'm going to survive and I'm going to give myself longterm problems in the process. But a little part of me keeps saying that I still have to try.

 

[StrangePossum]

I read that thread too and a few other SN documentations and it does scare me. Now that N isn't available, SN is the most accessible method for me, but it honestly sounds scary. It seems like most people vomit, and I don't want to be in pain/panicking while I die. I've read that people tend to gasp for air too and that scares me because does that mean that it feels like you are suffocating? I don't know, if I were really desperate then it would probably be easy to get ahold of, and at least any suffering would only happen for a relatively short amount of time, but I'm more hesitant about using it as my method. I wish N were still available.

 

[Jadzia]

I have many concerns about SN but the other thread you're referring to hasn't added to them. It's just reinforced that it's important to drink enough, drink it fairly quickly and don't sip it and make sure there are back up glasses. If I use this method I'll have 3 back up glasses.

 

[LittleBlackCat]

What is your method if you don't mind me asking?

CO I think. I will try this first and if I fail it will have to be SN ..

 

[hopelessgirl]

scared as fuck but highly motivated to do it anyways

 

[Asiam]

I for one am shocked sn is the most popular method. I heard about it on a 48 hours (I think?) podcast or some other podcast and they had some guy on there talk about how its painful.. Scared me away from the idea then the other post definitely made it a not possible for me. Nitrogen tank seems to be the way to go

 

[gimzero]

Its a poison so it need to be ready.