Anyone else feel weird as a suicidal person?

[Kramer]

Looking at pictures of people who died by suicide is comforting because they look like people you see every day. But normally I feel strange when I'm planning out my death.

 

[ecmnesia]

not much to add, but yes
to be fair, when i look in the mirror i dont think i look like someone who'd ctb, but guess nobody does

 

[WornOutLife]

Kinda. The thing is I've always felt different from the rest of the ordinary human beings.
"Study, work, have children, buy a house and die as an old grey man"
That's too basic and boring for me. I prefer being the weird guy and experiencing rare stuff during this short life.

 

[Kramer]

not much to add, but yes
to be fair, when i look in the mirror i dont think i look like someone who'd ctb, but guess nobody does

Oh many have the look. The chronically depressed who don't hide it, those who wear baggy clothes to make them "invisible", etc.

Kinda. The thing is I've always felt different from the rest of the ordinary human beings.
"Study, work, have children, buy a house and die as an old grey man"
That's too basic and boring for me. I prefer being the weird guy and experiencing rare stuff during this short life.

Is that you in your pic?

 

[WornOutLife]

Oh many have the look. The chronically depressed who don't hide it, those who wear baggy clothes to make them "invisible", etc.

Is that you in your pic?

Yeah, sorry if I scared you lol

 

[hoping to lose hope]

Everyone kills themselves I am certain that if we were immortal suicide would be done by everyone.
I do not feel strange for the reason you mentioned though just freaking out over death.

 

[Kramer]

Yeah, sorry if I scared you lol

You look normal and like people I've seen

Everyone kills themselves I am certain that if we were immortal suicide would be done by everyone.
I do not feel strange for the reason you mentioned though just freaking out over death.

That's an interesting perspective

 

[WornOutLife]

You look normal and like people I've seen

Oh those are just my outer looks. I'm weird in any other sense such as hobbies, being a neet, otaku, learning japanese, hating human beings for being "basic" for the reasons I said above and so on.

I don't want to work my ass of until I die neither have children, only those two things make me atypical lol

 

[hoping to lose hope]

@WornOutLife Waifu?

 

[WornOutLife]

@WornOutLife Waifu?

You got me there! haha

 

[hoping to lose hope]

Waifuism is good and pure hopefully be with waifu in afterlife.

 

[hoping to lose hope]

I kinda feel the same people know I'm suicidal and everyone thinks I'm recovering but some how everytime I look in the mirror I dont think I would ever kms I dont look like that kinda girl I look like I should be stable and fine but um not I a mess I'm a wreck and I want to die

Who we are has little to do with what we look like notthat you cannot draw some conclusions from peoples looks that are likely true.
Try not to judge yourself too much for not looking like a mess.
A lot of peoplestruggle that do not fit the stereotype of looking like it.

 

[Deleted member 17949]

I definitely look like the kind of retard that has no life and is destined to kill himself so nah don't feel that weird ngl

 

[PNKPNDA]

I don't want to work my ass of until I die neither have children, only those two things make me atypical lol

yeah i dont wanna work til i die either it really is just an endless cycle lol as much as i want kids i worry i will pass my shitty brain genetics onto them and i would hate to have something that has come from me to feel as shit as I do about life u kno

 

[Kramer]

yea it's always the people that look okay that aren't and sometimes I forget that

No not always. People need to learn to not generalize

 

[I’vehadenough]

Looking at pictures of people who died by suicide is comforting because they look like people you see every day. But normally I feel strange when I'm planning out my death.

Yes, but I have no choice

 

[MrBigSad]

One of my friends died of heroine overdose. I'll never know if it was intentional or not. Yeah he was a beggar. He'd been pure scum of the earth in most folks eyes but I always felt like he had a good heart. I'll never know for sure now. Life is long. Cold and harsh, they say "you won't know till you've tried" but we've tried all our lives.

They say it'll get better when it doesn't.

I hope he went peacefully anyway.

When you break it down statistically you've probably walked past literally hundreds of people that will commit suicide but you won't know. Because their problems aren't yours after all.

 

[bov]

Yes, but I have no choice

What's your situation?

 

[foxdie]

I've always felt weird so I guess being suicidal hasn't changed my self perception much.

 

[bov]

Sometimes I wonder what suicidality in the absence of unhappiness would mean: intense curiosity about the other side? Craving an end to the suspense of how life ends?

 

[MrBigSad]

Sometimes I wonder what suicidality in the absence of unhappiness would mean: intense curiosity about the other side? Craving an end to the suspense of how life ends?

When my therapist asked my why I had suicidal thoughts it felt a little embarrassing to explain that this is a good portion why. Like 30% hate life but also 70% is there something after this? I want want to find out.

Curiosity killed the cat ;)

 

[I’vehadenough]

What's your situation?

A guy attacked me and fucked my face up. I can't live a normal life anymore, so I have no choice but to end it

 

[waterstrider]

I think those people who actually go through with ctb (because nobody notices beforehand) are always those who blend in the most.
I am happy not to be the most noticeable person and therefore I'm often overlooked. Neither friends nor family suspect me being suicidal and thus I don't get treated like a criminal but like a "normal" part of society.

 

[AltFoxx]

Feeling suicidal half the times feels more rational than anything so I can't say it's that strange

 

[SirChuxAlot]

Weird, no, embaressed yes, only because I haven't gone through with CTBing yet. I continue to try to give myself a validation for living but really there isn't one and realize I continue to lie myself that things will get better.

 

[bov]

A guy attacked me and fucked my face up. I can't live a normal life anymore, so I have no choice but to end it

You definitely still have a choice but I'm so sorry that happened to you.

 

[Kramer]

A guy attacked me and fucked my face up. I can't live a normal life anymore, so I have no choice but to end it

Are you a guy or a girl?

 

[bov]

Are you a guy or a girl?

Does it matter

 

[Kramer]

Does it matter

Why you getting triggered?

 

[I’vehadenough]

You definitely still have a choice but I'm so sorry that happened to you.

Yes. My choices are to live in agony or die. I'd rather die

Are you a guy or a girl?

Girl