LonelyKitten
Seeking one final escape
- Aug 13, 2023
- 284
Title, really.
My emotions have been bouncing ALL over the damn place.
I've never been so close to death (aside from accidentally), I own so many methods now, largely understand most of them (I have a fairly solid plan in mind), and have the lowest amount of hope left in myself and my life that I've ever had.
And I am SO ready to just book it, to finally end it.
I'm kind of just, erh, squeezing the lemon, at this point, if you get what I mean?
But oddly, when say, a stranger is nice to me, or someone does just a little bit more than I expect them to (like give me random compliments, or when I ask for help with something minute, they engage a little further), I'm reminded of what life can be worth being there for - kind, genuine, even random, moments of human connection.
Even though they're so damn fleeting, and so expensive, and it's so hard to catch up and keep track aaaaa
Maybe it's just SI latching on to the most random thing but I'm curious if anyone else has had strong feelings like this invoked by something so tiny?am I just losing my mind
My emotions have been bouncing ALL over the damn place.
I've never been so close to death (aside from accidentally), I own so many methods now, largely understand most of them (I have a fairly solid plan in mind), and have the lowest amount of hope left in myself and my life that I've ever had.
And I am SO ready to just book it, to finally end it.
I'm kind of just, erh, squeezing the lemon, at this point, if you get what I mean?
But oddly, when say, a stranger is nice to me, or someone does just a little bit more than I expect them to (like give me random compliments, or when I ask for help with something minute, they engage a little further), I'm reminded of what life can be worth being there for - kind, genuine, even random, moments of human connection.
Even though they're so damn fleeting, and so expensive, and it's so hard to catch up and keep track aaaaa
Maybe it's just SI latching on to the most random thing but I'm curious if anyone else has had strong feelings like this invoked by something so tiny?
