There is a really good chance I have been isolated too long to make a new friend. Is there really always a lot of fakery in being social or is this just true for less fortunate people (I would like to know what to expect while I try to make a friend)?
I wonder if the perceived "negativity" to which you refer is actually just honesty. The only new "friend" I have made since I was a child is my boyfriend who seemed very "negative" to me at first. He eventual convinced me, however, that all his "negativity" was acceptable and I can't help wonder if he is, in fact, not very negative but, instead, I was just brainwashed into toxic positivity; I find I am fascinated by freeing my mind and challenging my "positive" thought.
I wanted to find a good article on positive toxicity but couldn't find anything that didn't seem biased. I feel like there is a good chance you already know all about toxic positivity but, just in case ... this post excerpt from a philosophy form is the first thing I found that didn't seem slanted:
"
'Whatever you try to avoid becomes the very basis of your consciousness.' - Sadghuru
Avoidance of negativity, then, fills one with negativity (gunpowder kegs). Sadly, the most dysfunctional defense mechanism, denial, is central to the positivity movement (how so many could be unaware of this is and index of mob psychology having taken over).
It would be just as imbalanced always trying to establish positivity, toxic actually (so there's toxic positivity and toxic negativity). Beware of mistaking ego or self for the full extent of consciousness. Identification with positivity does not mean you are positive; if one's self-ideal is positive it does not mean he is (by the bye, self-ideal is a delusional image which leads to mania). There is what you are and nothing else; of course the portions of the psyche you can include in awareness changes, but what you really are is much more expansive than awareness of one or two pixels of the complete picture.
No one is so perfect as to be happy all the time, if they say so, they are identified with ego to a large extent, and may have little inward awareness (eg. the friends of a self-proclaimed positivist may not see him as being very positive even though he preaches positivity). Ego says, "I'm positive" meanwhile, in the subconscious swirls anger, hate, and violence. Inner awareness has to find the defilements that refuse repose and keep light shone on them; and there are no actions to take in doing away with restlessness...it has to be negated by negating all action. Once all action (and reward seeking behavior) is negated...awareness, and much more of it remains."