Method Any easy, relatively painless way for a 17 year old who lives at home to commit suicide?

[TheCuriousityDude]

If you want details on why I hate myself so much, here they are ---> https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/suicide-by-lack-of-oxygen.5933/#post-98228

In short, I have some really bad anhedonia, and from when I can first remember, at like 3 or 4 in pre-school, I've just literally never been happy. Any any brief moment of happiness I have is just that, a brief few seconds in a 24 hour day full of pain, depression, anxiety, hating myself, being jealous of others and how much better they are than me, inability to feel pleasure, etc...and just overall really bad anhedodnia.

And more or less recently, ever since September 29, I've been looking for an easy way out of life so I can finally be happy..since I'll be dead, I'll be nothing, and not have to worry anymore about anything.

Thus far, I've tried killing myself by 2 methods...1, a plastic bag over my head, and 2, hanging myself from my doornob with a belt.

The former I described in the middle of my previous post if you read it...if you didn't, just basically, on my phone I put in a YouTube playlist on auto-play, one cointaining all my favorite songs I've ever listened to, I put on my earbuds, put a plastic bag over my head, layed on my bed as if I were to sleep normally, and just waited...eventually, my heart was beating super fast, I was desparately gasping for air, I could feel myself losing life, but I'd take the bag off my head last minute. The discomfort was too much and a part of me wasn't sure I was ready to throw 17 years of experience all away, and a part of me was also a bit scared of what could happen after death.

The latter I tried this morning today. I locked the door to my room as my father was home and awake. I also did the phone thing like last time, with my favorite songs...but this time, I put my belt on the smallest hole, I put it over my closet doornoob, I leaned on my closet door, I put my head into the belt, and just sort of stayed there sitting, leaning on the door a bit, but also far enough to feel some discomfort on my neck...I don't know if it was actually working or not. I hear this type of partial hanging method is supposed to make you pass out first, and then you die...but it didn't feel like I was gonna pass out. I was feeling rather uncomfortable with the pressure of the belt on my neck, and I couldn't swallow my spit because of the pressure, so it was definitely uncomfortable...but I'm not sure it was working. Eventually, after 22 minutes of trying this method out, 22 minutes worth of listening to my favorite songs, the belt just slipped off of the doornob, and the attempt had officially failed...a few minutes after that my dad came to knock on the door, since it was 1PM,and any time later than 1PM is too late to wake up considering I slept since 6PM last night (on a day before school I only sleep like 3 hours on average, so go figure). And so I couldn't continue my attempt right away. I just went to eat breakfast.

Overall, I kind of think that both of my methods were about 100% fail rates...

For the first, I can get pretty near death, but by a certain point I don't think my survival instinct will allow me to keep going at it, as I know I can prevent the desperate need of oxygen by just simply taking off the bag.

For the second, I think I've been doing it wrong altogether, and I don't know if it was actually working rather than just more-so making me uncomfortable near the neck area, and the blood on my face feel rather cold. I'm about 70 inches tall and all the doors around my apartment are only about slightly taller than myself...like about 78 inches tall. So perhaps the doornob just isn't tall enough. Or maybe I just did the belt thing wrong. I don't know, but it didn't seem like it was working. Maybe it was, I just needed to sit there longer, and put some type of tape so the belt doesn't slip off.

I guess it was a method similar to the one Robin Williams tried but in the video it said he would've blacked out in 5 to 15 seconds, and death would've occured in 3 to 5 minutes...but in my case 22 minutes had passed and nothing fucking happened...why am I so fucking bad at everything I do...

I can't really buy anything, as I live at home, and have absolutely no money and no job...I'm just a 17 year old high school junior, or 11th grader. Plus, my parents are aware I'm a suicidal person, so they wouldn't buy anything that even relatively hints at me trying out suicide. I therefore gotta "get creative" with usual household stuff.

I have one belt...I have some plastic belts around...I have a sink...I have a bath tub...I have a lighter...there are kitchen knives...I have a blanket I could perhaps also tie around my neck or something...I have plenty suicide tools around my house, but a lot of those methods are too painful or will just make me give up last minute.

Burning myself...nah, too much pain, and if I survive I will literally live life as a deformed monster. Cutting myself? Nah...also too painful, and if I survive I have to live with ugly cuts all over my body, which definitely isn't good for someone with OCD who likes smooth skin at all costs. Plastic bag...it was working, but I always gave up last minute. Drowning my head in a sink and bath tub...I tried, but whenever I got relatively uncomfortable I pulled my head back up, always. The belt from a doornoob method...I tried it but it seemed ineffective.

Come on, there has GOT to be some way I can take my life away with common household items! I don't want to go on with life being the loser with anhedonia I've always been! I'd rather just die! I've been thinking of killing myself since I was like 8, after all. Actually 11 or 12, but back when I was 8 I didn't know what suicide was, I was just like, "It'd be better if I didn't exist, mommy"...so I guess it counts in a way.

I am overall just a complete and total loose canon who does nothing but screw up my own life even further, and hurt the people who I come in contact with. I am desparately looking for an easy, relatively death. 100% painless is probably just impossible, but near painless is good enough.

 

[Roulette]

A belt probably isn't oppressive enough compared to rope or something similar. The one in the video showed a towel within the belt which is a decent addition.

Your goal is to compress the artery, as restricting bloodflow is the key to unconsciousness. If all you manage to do is deprive yourself, or your brain of oxygen, you'll get into trouble as your body will do everything in it's power to get that oxygen.

For more information : https://sanctioned-suicide.net/threads/how-to-hang-yourself.1183/

 

[Sharethepain]

You must have been doing the doorknob method wrong. Either tie the belt tighter to the knob or drop yourself lower to the ground somehow if possible. Gravity will do the work but you gotta give it the space it needs. Try finding something else to hang yourself from if the doorknob proves to be too low. If done correctly you should blackout really quick. Its just like normal hanging, it simply needs a lot of pressure, you literally have to be hanging from the knob to make it work.

Apart from hanging overdosing is a possibility but you need to have some good stuff to OD on at home and know how much you need of it.

Id forget cutting because you really need to be either a hero or insane to cut deep enough to bleed out.

Not sure if you are limited to just your house, but you could try jumping from somewhere or underneath something as well, its cost free too.

 

[Final Escape]

Sometimes u have to get creative and look for household items. Or find tall building or spot to jump off. I wouldn't stab myself in the neck or chest lol! I just read about a guy on death space who died of a brain eating amoeba. I looked up how u contract this organism, it kills u pretty fast but u get sick before hand. You get it from lake or river and it goes in through your nose. Keep goin to a fresh water lake and getting water up the nose and maybe eventually u can contract this thing and bam you're dead.

 

[scales]

The PPeH mentions a good but rough method using household cleaners. I think the advice on hanging is pretty good, but if you really want to try the airbag thing again you might want to read the PPeH (there's a link on this website somewhere) that can give you more information about how to do it properly. It might depend on your ability to obtain certain materials like a nitrogen or argon tank to take the place of the oxygen you should be breathing.

 

[Sayo]

Easy and painless with household items is almost impossible. As someone mentioned the Peaceful Pill Handbook describes how to use detergents, but it's pretty horrible and you don't want to be found while doing it.

Will you be able to move out in a year or so? Even if not, will you not have a bit more independence when you graduate?

It honestly might be better to wait until then, and also see if independence brings a way out. Your last moments are worth not having in pain. I have severe anhedonia and know how bad it is, but it doesn't seem like you're fully at peace with death yet. That doesn't make you not suicidal.

As someone who also suffered all their childhood, I'm sorry.

 

[Trashcan]

Would it be possible to get a part time job, even if it's just babysitting or something along those lines, so you can have money? That would really open up your options.

 

[PsychoPyro]

Would it be possible to get a part time job, even if it's just babysitting or something along those lines, so you can have money? That would really open up your options.

Yeah, just buy a $20 pack of anti-anhedonia. Genius idea, can't believe he never thought of getting a job.

/s

 

[Trashcan]

Yeah, just buy a $20 pack of anti-anhedonia. Genius idea, can't believe he never thought of getting a job.

/s

I was obviously talking about how having more money opens up OP's options to ctb. Like he could invest in a good rope for example, which is not expensive at all. You don't even need $20.

 

[BjartNO]

brain eating amoeba

Hmm! I had to google this one.

It doesn't happen often. But most summers, several Americans -- usually healthy, young people -- suffer sudden, tragic deaths from a brain-eating amoeba.

What is this scary bug? How does it get to the brain? Where is it and how can I avoid it? WebMD answers these and other questions.

Also, where can I find it???

Amoebas are single-celled organisms. The so-called brain-eating amoeba is a species discovered in 1965. It's formal name is Naegleria fowleri. Although first identified in Australia, this amoeba is believed to have evolved in the U.S.

OK, so where is it???

Where Are Brain-Eating Amoebas Found?

TELL ME!!!!

Naegleria loves very warm water. It can survive in water as hot as 113 degrees Fahrenheit.

These amoebas can be found in warm places around the globe. N. fowleri is found in:

• Warm lakes, ponds, and rock pits
• Mud puddles
• Warm, slow-flowing rivers, especially those with low water levels
• Untreated swimming pools and spas
• Untreated well water or untreated municipal water
• Hot springs and other geothermal water sources
• Thermally polluted water, such as runoff from power plants
• Aquariums
• Soil, including indoor dust

Naegleria can't live in salt water. It can't survive in properly treated swimming pools or in properly treated municipal water.

Most cases of N. fowleri disease occur in Southern or Southwestern states. Over half of all infections have been in Florida and Texas.

I'll get my swimsuit