bitofftoomuch
hold onto those who accept your messy self
- Jul 1, 2024
- 147
can't move. am convinced I'll die if I try to do work even though I know I need to do it.
the stress is so bad that monday and tuesday i had to binge drink to fall asleep. vomited yesterday morning. last night I didn't drink and couldn't sleep.
today i'm tired and scared and just feel like I need some form of rest that I can't acquire. not doing work of course makes my anxiety worse, but so does doing work so there's no winning. maybe i sense i'm already past my limit and just want some control over how I break.
i just feel pain pain pain and what is the point. i live with someone i barely know. no family to keep in touch with. no SO. some friends. but it's not enough for me.
i want meds but i don't know if they'll even work. i want meds i want meds i want meds.
the stress is so bad that monday and tuesday i had to binge drink to fall asleep. vomited yesterday morning. last night I didn't drink and couldn't sleep.
today i'm tired and scared and just feel like I need some form of rest that I can't acquire. not doing work of course makes my anxiety worse, but so does doing work so there's no winning. maybe i sense i'm already past my limit and just want some control over how I break.
i just feel pain pain pain and what is the point. i live with someone i barely know. no family to keep in touch with. no SO. some friends. but it's not enough for me.
i want meds but i don't know if they'll even work. i want meds i want meds i want meds.