Venting Another day sleeping like absolute shit

[whatevs]

I went to bed early and woke up early. No fucking use.

It's been 10 years now. At some point something went wrong and I started feeling unrefreshed upon waking up. Been to dozens of doctors, quacks, you name it. It takes away almost everything from you, ranging from sense of humour to sexual capacity. Of course, you also become noticeably dumber. Over time, it kills you via cardiovascular disease or something related with a depressed immune system. Slow, agonizing death. I am weak, I look haggard and dazed. I spend all winter feeling cold or getting ill and my sphere of activities is so limited that every time I visit town something has changed.

I literally live every day something similar to standard torture practices that you can read about in the defunct Soviet Union. By default, they disturbed the sleep of the prisoner, and then built from there.

I distracted myself last year studying to become a programmer but my body is telling me that all of that is useless and in fact impossible if we keep deteriorating. Sleep is essential, and I feel miserable every fucking day. If your quality of life is poor no matter what you do, it kind of nullifies the value that exerting effort promises. If this isn't solved, and I hate to say but I see no reason for it to be solved, I will have to CTB. Doctors have never even acknowledged that there is a problem, and sleep studies are useless, as have been sleeping pills.

 

[completely-done]

i know a bit what you feel. my doctors just told me theyve exhausted all options for my insomnia. every few days i crash and sleep for the entire day-absolute torture. i've been getting weird NDE-like dreams ever since seriously deciding to ctb. i'm sorry youre going through this. my heart goes out to you

 

[whatevs]

i know a bit what you feel. my doctors just told me theyve exhausted all options for my insomnia. every few days i crash and sleep for the entire day-absolute torture. i've been getting weird NDE-like dreams ever since seriously deciding to ctb. i'm sorry youre going through this. my heart goes out to you

Your disorder is very peculiar, so you can't sleep for days and then sleep for large periods of time?

 

[completely-done]

Your disorder is very peculiar, so you can't sleep for days and then sleep for large periods of time?

Yeah it's strange. I slept for 2 days this weekend and now have been up for 24 hours, i'll probably fall asleep in 2 more days. insomnia...

 

[Nightmare Painting]

I fall asleep easily but I've never once woken up feeling refreshed my entire life. Trauma messes up your physical health across a wide spectrum and I don't believe sleep is an exception.

 

[Ligottian]

Winter is hell for me. This includes a fucked up sleeping pattern.

 

[Dot]

Nt sre if n.e.1 hs hrd of nervs systm apprch bt mght b of hlp 2 sm1

 

[FractalTears]

At some point something went wrong and I started feeling unrefreshed upon waking up.

Same for me, its torture, I'm sorry.

 

[Ethereal Knight]

have you checked for breathing problems or breathing disorders?
see this TED-talk by Barry Krakow
this guy's insomnia was "cured" after his dentist proposed to him that he should use a "mandibular advancement device". he also uses nasal strips.
have you had a sleep study to rule out certain conditions?
have you tried to check with your doctor if medication could be helpful for you?
have you checked your vitamin D levels?
do you expose yourself to sunlight first thing in the morning to set you circadian rhythm (body's clock)?
do you exercise?
have you tried magnesium supplements?
have you tried CBT-i?

I personally have chronic insomnia too, I wake up too early and become exausted / ultra fatigued the next day,
I had some success treating it with amitriptyline, then I switch to mirtazapine, but both made me gain too much weight and made me tired during the day.
so I'm currently trying to use promethazine.
tried trazodone in the past, it didn't work.
I plan to try low-dose doxepin in the future.
for now I'll stick to promethazine because it doesn't make me gain weight and doesn't need prescription.
there are other drugs as well that have been sugested to treat insomnia, even paroxetine has been studied to treat insomnia.
I personally don't like drugs like eszopiclone and olanzapine, due to their side-effects, I don't like to use anti-psychotics or benzodiazepines for treating my insomnia, as benzos stop working overtime and are hard come off, and anti-psychotics have their own problems.
be aware though, that most of these drugs can increase your risk of dementia dramatically if you use them long-term. this is due to their anti-cholinergic effects.
from this list, trazodone and low-dose doxepin are exceptions, as their anti-cholinergic effects are very weak.

 

[whatevs]

have you checked for breathing problems or breathing disorders?
see this TED-talk by Barry Krakow
this guy's insomnia was "cured" after his dentist proposed to him that he should use a "mandibular advancement device". he also uses nasal strips.
have you had a sleep study to rule out certain conditions?
have you tried to check with your doctor if medication could be helpful for you?
have you checked your vitamin D levels?
do you expose yourself to sunlight first thing in the morning to set you circadian rhythm (body's clock)?
do you exercise?
have you tried magnesium supplements?
have you tried CBT-i?

I personally have chronic insomnia too, I wake up too early and become exausted / ultra fatigued the next day,
I had some success treating it with amitriptyline, then I switch to mirtazapine, but both made me gain too much weight and made me tired during the day.
so I'm currently trying to use promethazine.
tried trazodone in the past, it didn't work.
I plan to try low-dose doxepin in the future.
for now I'll stick to promethazine because it doesn't make me gain weight and doesn't need prescription.
there are other drugs as well that have been sugested to treat insomnia, even paroxetine has been studied to treat insomnia.
I personally don't like drugs like eszopiclone and olanzapine, due to their side-effects, I don't like to use anti-psychotics or benzodiazepines for treating my insomnia, as benzos stop working overtime and are hard come off, and anti-psychotics have their own problems.
be aware though, that most of these drugs can increase your risk of dementia dramatically if you use them long-term. this is due to their anti-cholinergic effects.
from this list, trazodone and low-dose doxepin are exceptions, as their anti-cholinergic effects are very weak.

Damn, dude, talk about a detailed, helpful response! Lot's of interesting things in there, for starters this has prompted me to book an appointment with a recommended odontologist.

 

[AreWeWinning]

I went to bed early and woke up early. No fucking use.

It's been 10 years now. At some point something went wrong and I started feeling unrefreshed upon waking up. Been to dozens of doctors, quacks, you name it. It takes away almost everything from you, ranging from sense of humour to sexual capacity. Of course, you also become noticeably dumber. Over time, it kills you via cardiovascular disease or something related with a depressed immune system. Slow, agonizing death. I am weak, I look haggard and dazed. I spend all winter feeling cold or getting ill and my sphere of activities is so limited that every time I visit town something has changed.

I literally live every day something similar to standard torture practices that you can read about in the defunct Soviet Union. By default, they disturbed the sleep of the prisoner, and then built from there.

I distracted myself last year studying to become a programmer but my body is telling me that all of that is useless and in fact impossible if we keep deteriorating. Sleep is essential, and I feel miserable every fucking day. If your quality of life is poor no matter what you do, it kind of nullifies the value that exerting effort promises. If this isn't solved, and I hate to say but I see no reason for it to be solved, I will have to CTB. Doctors have never even acknowledged that there is a problem, and sleep studies are useless, as have been sleeping pills.

Same problem. Well, not exactly, but similar. I feel I have to piss all the time, even if there is nothing to piss, and this prevents me from sleeping well. It started about 5 years ago. It comes with age, and there is no cure, no underlying conditions, doctors can't help. It's not like I have to wake up x amount of times, but the urge is constantly there, so even if I fall asleep, it feels fragmented and shallow.

From time to time, I can manage to get good sleep, but it's the exception, not the norm. It's a constant battle, my life revolves around this. It's hard to plan anything, because I don't know how I'll sleep the night before. My mental and work capacity on average is about 60-80% of what it used to be.

The worst part is that it's not something you can openly talk about (arguable) or something that people understand. If you talk about it, the answer is usually "it's all in your head, get over it". It's an invisible burden. People only see that you cannot manage yourself, and you're failing in life, but the reasons are invisible.

I remember when I was younger, having a good night's sleep was only a question of when I went to bed. That sweet lazy feeling in the morning, after 8-9 hours of deep sleep, waking up 100% refreshed and full of mental energy. Doesn't happen anymore.

I'm coming to the conclusion that life is not worth living like this.

It still saddens me that I have struggled through life all this way, and now I have to throw it all away just because of this one thing that cripples me. It also saddens me that I'll disappoint my relatives. But I really see no other way out of this. It's a logical, rational choice. I used to be suicidal on bad days, and optimistic, energetic on good days. I used to have hope too, kept trying, googled everything about this for years, went to several doctors. But now my attitude is changing.

Now, even on good days, when I'm well rested, I'm not impressed. I realise, that in the moment I feel good, but overall I have more bad than good days, and my life is struggle. Even when I feel good, I know it's temporary, and I still want to end it.

 

[CiproKilledMe]

have you checked for breathing problems or breathing disorders?
see this TED-talk by Barry Krakow
this guy's insomnia was "cured" after his dentist proposed to him that he should use a "mandibular advancement device". he also uses nasal strips.
have you had a sleep study to rule out certain conditions?
have you tried to check with your doctor if medication could be helpful for you?
have you checked your vitamin D levels?
do you expose yourself to sunlight first thing in the morning to set you circadian rhythm (body's clock)?
do you exercise?
have you tried magnesium supplements?
have you tried CBT-i?

I personally have chronic insomnia too, I wake up too early and become exausted / ultra fatigued the next day,
I had some success treating it with amitriptyline, then I switch to mirtazapine, but both made me gain too much weight and made me tired during the day.
so I'm currently trying to use promethazine.
tried trazodone in the past, it didn't work.
I plan to try low-dose doxepin in the future.
for now I'll stick to promethazine because it doesn't make me gain weight and doesn't need prescription.
there are other drugs as well that have been sugested to treat insomnia, even paroxetine has been studied to treat insomnia.
I personally don't like drugs like eszopiclone and olanzapine, due to their side-effects, I don't like to use anti-psychotics or benzodiazepines for treating my insomnia, as benzos stop working overtime and are hard come off, and anti-psychotics have their own problems.
be aware though, that most of these drugs can increase your risk of dementia dramatically if you use them long-term. this is due to their anti-cholinergic effects.
from this list, trazodone and low-dose doxepin are exceptions, as their anti-cholinergic effects are very weak.

What do you think of Ambien?

 

[TakeMeBack07]

Damn, dude, talk about a detailed, helpful response! Lot's of interesting things in there, for starters this has prompted me to book an appointment with a recommended odontologist.

Best of luck

 

[Matthtvr]

I went to bed early and woke up early. No fucking use.

It's been 10 years now. At some point something went wrong and I started feeling unrefreshed upon waking up. Been to dozens of doctors, quacks, you name it. It takes away almost everything from you, ranging from sense of humour to sexual capacity. Of course, you also become noticeably dumber. Over time, it kills you via cardiovascular disease or something related with a depressed immune system. Slow, agonizing death. I am weak, I look haggard and dazed. I spend all winter feeling cold or getting ill and my sphere of activities is so limited that every time I visit town something has changed.

I literally live every day something similar to standard torture practices that you can read about in the defunct Soviet Union. By default, they disturbed the sleep of the prisoner, and then built from there.

I distracted myself last year studying to become a programmer but my body is telling me that all of that is useless and in fact impossible if we keep deteriorating. Sleep is essential, and I feel miserable every fucking day. If your quality of life is poor no matter what you do, it kind of nullifies the value that exerting effort promises. If this isn't solved, and I hate to say but I see no reason for it to be solved, I will have to CTB. Doctors have never even acknowledged that there is a problem, and sleep studies are useless, as have been sleeping pills.

I have insomnia two. I use sleeping pills etc and recently tested melatonin 1mg 3 per Night. And it works.

 

[Ethereal Knight]

What do you think of Ambien?

I personally never tried it (zolpidem), but anyone can read online that "Zolpidem is labelled for short-term (usually about two to six weeks) treatment of insomnia at the lowest possible dose." and for a good reason, "As zolpidem is associated with drug tolerance and substance dependence, (...)Tolerance to the effects of zolpidem can develop in some people in just a few weeks(...) When drug tolerance and physical dependence to zolpidem develop, treatment usually entails a gradual dose reduction over a period of months to minimize withdrawal symptoms, which can resemble those seen during benzodiazepine withdrawal." ( https://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Zolpidem )

If one is aware that they are going to use a sleep drug for more than 6 weeks, then why would they choose one that builds tolerance over time, if they could use one that is more safe, like trazodone , low-dose doxepin or even some other invertentions like CBT-i? I don't know. I'd prefer CBT-i coupled with the drugs that are less likely to build tolerance overtime, especially as someone with chronic insomnia who is not likely to be cured anytime soon, but that's just me...

also, zolpidem isn't supposed to be used if you have sleep apnea. so why not do a sleep study to rule out sleep apnea, other breathing disorders, restless leg syndrome etc etc... I'd definitely do a sleep study.

 

[whatevs]

Zolpidem is the only drug that knocked me out cold consistently for 2 weeks. Strangely enough, ever since it seems to have almost no effect. I never got to experience any cool nightly wandering with it either.

I have insomnia two. I use sleeping pills etc and recently tested melatonin 1mg 3 per Night. And it works.

The most effective melatonin is sublingual.

Unfortunately I normally have more issues with the quality of the sleep than with sleep latency. Melatonin only made me fall asleep earlier and increased the vividness of dreams and nightmares. I still didn't feel rested or refreshed.

 

[meetapple]

Winter is hell for me. This includes a fucked up sleeping pattern.

Do you use light therapy?

 

[Ligottian]

Do you use light therapy?

No.

 

[ikadasui]

I went to bed early and woke up early. No fucking use.

It's been 10 years now. At some point something went wrong and I started feeling unrefreshed upon waking up. Been to dozens of doctors, quacks, you name it. It takes away almost everything from you, ranging from sense of humour to sexual capacity. Of course, you also become noticeably dumber. Over time, it kills you via cardiovascular disease or something related with a depressed immune system. Slow, agonizing death. I am weak, I look haggard and dazed. I spend all winter feeling cold or getting ill and my sphere of activities is so limited that every time I visit town something has changed.

I literally live every day something similar to standard torture practices that you can read about in the defunct Soviet Union. By default, they disturbed the sleep of the prisoner, and then built from there.

I distracted myself last year studying to become a programmer but my body is telling me that all of that is useless and in fact impossible if we keep deteriorating. Sleep is essential, and I feel miserable every fucking day. If your quality of life is poor no matter what you do, it kind of nullifies the value that exerting effort promises. If this isn't solved, and I hate to say but I see no reason for it to be solved, I will have to CTB. Doctors have never even acknowledged that there is a problem, and sleep studies are useless, as have been sleeping pills.

Now this I can relate to! I've tried all kinds of sleep aids, alcohol, weed, excessive excersise and I still average 4-5hrs a night and it's fucking miserable. Do you also wake up multiple times throughout the night so your sleep is staggerd? I'll also do that and have to take my sleep in chunks like 1hr, 30mins maybe 2 and then another 30 it really kills you

 

[CiproKilledMe]

Zolpidem is the only drug that knocked me out cold consistently for 2 weeks. Strangely enough, ever since it seems to have almost no effect. I never got to experience any cool nightly wandering with it either.

Just out of curiosity, did the zolpidem suddenly stop working for you after you got a new prescription? I have experienced the same exact problem with it, only I took it for DECADES before it suddenly completely stopped working approximately 3-4 years ago. Prior to that it was a miracle drug for me. I could take a quarter of a pill (2.5mg) and 15 minutes later it didn't matter what I was doing--I was going down! That all suddenly stopped when my pharmacy switched to a different manufacturer. Now I can take a full 10mg, stay wide awake for hours and not feel a damn thing. Out of frustration one night I Google'd "generic Ambien doesn't work" and found tons of stories from other people experiencing the same exact problem. It worked for them beautifully for years and then all of the sudden they were switched to another generic maker and it was useless (many of the makers whose zolpidem was highly regarded have ceased making it so we can't switch back). I've had my pharmacy order generics from a bunch of different manufacturers in an attempt to find one that works and have yet to find one. Even stranger, each brand makes me feel different so it's quite clear to me that all generic zolpidems are not created equal.