Imaginos
Full-time layabout
- Apr 7, 2018
- 638
Does anyone else struggle with issues of anger? Perhaps even hatred? For me, decades of living a miserable life has made me a very hateful person. I hate no one in particular, but I very much hate the world, and I do very much hate people in general. I'm a misanthrope to my bones, I'm afraid. People can be shot, stabbed, run over, or maimed. I really don't care. I won't deny I'm a very deformed individual, because I suppose I am. Having to have endured what I have endured has led me to this woeful position I now occupy. My soul, assuming it exists, and assuming I even had one to begin with, is a tattered and torn piece of cloth, while my heart is a cold rocky planetoid of jagged ice.
When push comes to shove and these corrosive feelings start to well up, I can't help, but give in to them. This passionate hatred of normals for everything that they are and all the stupid bullshit that they believe. It seems likely that I always will, frankly. No one has the right to judge me for feeling this hatred. No one. And yeah, you know what? I hate people for reasons that go far beyond their inability to honor or respect the wishes of the suicidal. FAR FUCKING MORE! Damn this world, and damn the masses of human garbage I have to share it with! They prance about in the light (whether outside or in their homes) without a single god damned care, while I've lurked in the darkness alone and in agony for as far back as I can remember. And to think they'd have the gaul TO THEN BLAME ME for being hateful! FUCK YOU! You try living and being born into an existence of perpetual misery and darkness. Let's see if you're not hateful and bitter by the end of it, you fucks!
Just, fuck it all. I'm so god damned tired. I've been condemned to a life where I was doomed to end up as the bad guy, the asshole, the lowly cretin that everyone spits on and pities. The only thing I can think of is why? Why fucking me? GOD DAMN IT! WHY? It's not fair. I didn't want this. I didn't ask for this. FUCK! God damn it, it's not fair. Death is the only thing, the only fucking thing that can redeem any of this. It's the only thing that ever could. Unfortunately, death honestly couldn't even appear as a relief to me now. The damage....is....DONE! It's.....TOO....LATE! If only I'd gotten fucking run over as a kid, but nope. Had to grow up to be the useless sack of hateful shit that I am now! That just had to happen apparently! Just look at all the good it did me! My entire existence has been a cruel and wretchedly shitty joke. One that sometimes I even meet, seeing the tragic comedy of it all, with the most bitterly dry and dismal laughter you can imagine. The bitterest of laughter, in place of the bitterest of tears.
And here's a song that sums the whole thing up for me quite well.
I've got a problem
A problem with hate
I can't go on dragging this weight
A cold steel hand that won't let go
Acid-filled thoughts out of control
I built myself a nice little cage
With bars of anger and a lock of rage
I can't help asking Who's got the key?
When I know damned well! It's me!
When push comes to shove and these corrosive feelings start to well up, I can't help, but give in to them. This passionate hatred of normals for everything that they are and all the stupid bullshit that they believe. It seems likely that I always will, frankly. No one has the right to judge me for feeling this hatred. No one. And yeah, you know what? I hate people for reasons that go far beyond their inability to honor or respect the wishes of the suicidal. FAR FUCKING MORE! Damn this world, and damn the masses of human garbage I have to share it with! They prance about in the light (whether outside or in their homes) without a single god damned care, while I've lurked in the darkness alone and in agony for as far back as I can remember. And to think they'd have the gaul TO THEN BLAME ME for being hateful! FUCK YOU! You try living and being born into an existence of perpetual misery and darkness. Let's see if you're not hateful and bitter by the end of it, you fucks!
Just, fuck it all. I'm so god damned tired. I've been condemned to a life where I was doomed to end up as the bad guy, the asshole, the lowly cretin that everyone spits on and pities. The only thing I can think of is why? Why fucking me? GOD DAMN IT! WHY? It's not fair. I didn't want this. I didn't ask for this. FUCK! God damn it, it's not fair. Death is the only thing, the only fucking thing that can redeem any of this. It's the only thing that ever could. Unfortunately, death honestly couldn't even appear as a relief to me now. The damage....is....DONE! It's.....TOO....LATE! If only I'd gotten fucking run over as a kid, but nope. Had to grow up to be the useless sack of hateful shit that I am now! That just had to happen apparently! Just look at all the good it did me! My entire existence has been a cruel and wretchedly shitty joke. One that sometimes I even meet, seeing the tragic comedy of it all, with the most bitterly dry and dismal laughter you can imagine. The bitterest of laughter, in place of the bitterest of tears.
And here's a song that sums the whole thing up for me quite well.
I've got a problem
A problem with hate
I can't go on dragging this weight
A cold steel hand that won't let go
Acid-filled thoughts out of control
I built myself a nice little cage
With bars of anger and a lock of rage
I can't help asking Who's got the key?
When I know damned well! It's me!