sasshimi
david lynched me
- Aug 20, 2019
- 38
I'm sick of it all, this fake recovery that I've been pretending to keep working on - spreading white lies and making empty promises to friends and family. I don't have the motivation and I don't think I ever will anyways. What pisses me off the most is how incredibly hard it is to get motivated, even when it comes to ctb. I'm just sitting around wasting time. My dad told me I should go pray and utilize the time I have left as much as possible, as long as he and my mom are still alive. I have heard of that guilt-trip-ridden statement a million times in my life. I couldn't say anything back to him because the answer is that I have the intention to die way before they could perish to old age/illnesses. I only have a month left. Why do I always fall for this shit though, I always seem to be synonymous with shame and guilt.