S
Sleepdrifter
Student
- Jun 22, 2020
- 151
This is a weird post so not sure where else to post. I'm in my late 30s and I'm not sure if I am alive. My most important life goal was to get a decent education, meet someone nice, and keep at least some friends or family. Since losing all of that I don't feel alive, like things keep moving, but it's not clear sure how or why. I have a job, make a little money and look after myself, have my own hobbies and projects, but this seems like being dead. Doctors just humiliate me or throw meds at me. Now I'm old and have missed out on everything while living in poverty. It's all impossible to deal with so I don't. Other people don't know what to make of me. I can make friends and make other people laugh easily, but since I'm dead or whatever, it seems pointless. It's not about understimulation or social competition, more like what being dead must be like. Anyway thanks for reading and hope someone else relates.