Welcome to SaSu!
Depending on where you live and upon availability homeless shelters can be an option but this is probably not the best option. Y is that absolutely not an option to live with your parents temporary?
Idk what u can actually do. I'm sorry you have to go through this.
I'm assuming a homeless shelter wouldn't be a consistent escape from being on the streets (or the wilderness), and that's what you mean by it not being the best option. That would make living at shelters basically a non-option for someone that can barely cope with a normal life like me.
It seems safe to assume there aren't any other live options aside from CTB, then. I'm usually not good at assessing what doors are still open to me in most situations, or what is most realistic/practical, but I guess this one is pretty straightforward.
What sucks is that where I'm, in terms of living arrangements, right now is pretty close to ideal to me, and it will be hard to put myself on the right mindset to discontinue my own existence like this. I know for a fact, though, that, as soon as I even see my parents, I won't have the desire to be alive anymore. In fact, I'll start feeling like ending not just myself again.
I think I'll cry for someone to let me crash at their place on Facebook or something. Then I'll fail at gathering any pity or sympathy, just like I failed at getting a job to keep myself afloat. Then I'll buy a rope and head to the woods to hang myself on a tree, and fail somehow too. Then I'll wander around the woods not knowing how to exit from it because I'm too much of a failure to remember the path I took to get in, eventually dying of starvation and thirst as I curse this world for being the way it is, and myself for being such a wretched loser in every conceivable level.
My parents are really, really lucky I'm this merciful.