Venting already dead and cold

[snxw]

i can feel myself becoming heartless... ikr so stereotypical but mean it. i never thought itd happen to me but i dont really care about much anymore. everything is so devoid of meaning to me now. all i seem to care about is drugs and finding ways to lessen suffering but even that im just starting to accept. im so blank of expression and motivation like im completely hollow as a person. my attachments are dead and so is the person i used to be. all that is left is this dying vessel to kill.

 

[FTL.Wanderer]

all i seem to care about is drugs and finding ways to lessen suffering

Agreed. I like the way you put it because it brings up why some of us engage in "bad behaviors" (poor eating, not exercising enough, drugs...). Like you're alluding to, we're suffering so much that the "healthy" choices aren't effective enough for us. Hope things turn around for you.

 

[FuneralCry]

I'm sorry you are suffering. In a way I feel like I have already died but I am still breathing and it can be such a depressing existence. I wish you well.

 

[Snake of Eden]

Like you're alluding to, we're suffering so much that the "healthy" choices aren't effective enough for us.

I find healthy stuff make me feel more shitty as they give me the clenrmindedness which makes me even more aware of my misery and dread of life. It is better to be unhealthy and hopefully succumb to death at a faster rate

 

[FTL.Wanderer]

I find healthy stuff make me feel more shitty as they give me the clenrmindedness which makes me even more aware of my misery and dread of life.

I agree. It's like being totally clear-minded while watching beings be tortured to death--but you have no power to stop it. Better to check out as much as possible.

 

[Deleted member 8975]

This is exactly me at this point in time. Fully dead inside. I don't even care about animals. I'm just truly sick and demented, lost.