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Tonic_Secrecy

Tonic_Secrecy

:<3
Jan 18, 2025
73
I was playing with some friends and my girlfriend when one of my friends said they hated their life. My girlfriend said she hated hers too and mentioned she's planning on ending it soon. At first, I told her, "Nuh-uh," but then I almost went on to tell her that if she does do it, let's do it together.

I love her, and normally I would never say something like that—I'd always opt to try and help instead. But I don't know. After she said that and some other stuff, I just felt something inside me break as my anxiety kept getting worse and worse.

After everything that was said in that call, I just feel horrible, like it's my fault. If she had someone better, she wouldn't want to end it. If she had something better, she wouldn't have said she doesn't feel like she's in a loving relationship. Maybe there isn't love anymore—I don't know. I just feel broken.

And for some reason, my card keeps declining on my SN order, even though I have enough money; I checked. After all the effort it took to find how to get it, I just keep repeatedly hitting walls. And now I keep getting hit with more reasons to end it all without the ability to actually do it.

I feel like shit. I just want it to all be over. I want to die.

I'll call my bank tomorrow to see if there's anything I can do about the decline. Thanks for reading my vent. If you're curious, we've been together for two years and I still haven't told her that I'm asexual and she wonders why I haven't done anything with her yet Im scared to tell her.
 
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Giovannino224

Giovannino224

Nobody can controll your mind, be aware of this
Dec 10, 2023
44
After everything that was said in that call, I just feel horrible, like it's my fault. If she had someone better, she wouldn't want to end it. If she had something better, she wouldn't have said she doesn't feel like she's in a loving relationship. Maybe there isn't love anymore—I don't know. I just feel broken.
After reading this the first thing that came to my mind was someting that a doctor once told me, and that is that our mind can create involuntary thoughts (thoughts that are automatically created by the brain after and emotional event, by anxiety, or just randomly [and also most of the times they are not realiable]), that I can guarantee you that the vast majority of those thoughts are FALSE.
So what I suggest to do is to ignore completely this sense of guilt and shame, or more in general to ignore any thought, that your anxiety made you belive, regarding the false opinion that your gf as of you. Insted tray to talk face to face with you gf about this without any worry, because if she really cares about you, you won't be dissapointed by what she has to say.

I hope my advise can help.

Stay safe
 
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N

Norseman

Autistic virgin
Aug 31, 2024
12
I was playing with some friends and my girlfriend when one of my friends said they hated their life. My girlfriend said she hated hers too and mentioned she's planning on ending it soon. At first, I told her, "Nuh-uh," but then I almost went on to tell her that if she does do it, let's do it together.

I love her, and normally I would never say something like that—I'd always opt to try and help instead. But I don't know. After she said that and some other stuff, I just felt something inside me break as my anxiety kept getting worse and worse.

After everything that was said in that call, I just feel horrible, like it's my fault. If she had someone better, she wouldn't want to end it. If she had something better, she wouldn't have said she doesn't feel like she's in a loving relationship. Maybe there isn't love anymore—I don't know. I just feel broken.

And for some reason, my card keeps declining on my SN order, even though I have enough money; I checked. After all the effort it took to find how to get it, I just keep repeatedly hitting walls. And now I keep getting hit with more reasons to end it all without the ability to actually do it.

I feel like shit. I just want it to all be over. I want to die.

I'll call my bank tomorrow to see if there's anything I can do about the decline. Thanks for reading my vent. If you're curious, we've been together for two years and I still haven't told her that I'm asexual and she wonders why I haven't done anything with her yet Im scared to tell her.
I wish i had a girlfriend at least in the past.
 
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NonEssential

NonEssential

Hanging in there
Jan 15, 2025
307
Fortunately if I'd say "let's do it together" it's just interpreted as me having a dark sense of humor

I wish i had a girlfriend at least in the past.
Same, pretty crazy I'm in my mid twenties and haven't had a single person lol
 
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ClippedWings

ClippedWings

Member
Nov 30, 2024
94
Fortunately if I'd say "let's do it together" it's just interpreted as me having a dark sense of humor


Same, pretty crazy I'm in my mid twenties and haven't had a single person lol
same but I'm older, and that fact is only like the 7th worst thing about me. FUCK! O well, ctb soon and never fucking wake up again. Don't bring me back.
 
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